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ladyflaunt
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Posted: Sunday May 8th, 2005 20:32 |
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Real Roxanne wrote: Richard whatever your name is how old are u?
Just because people have different opinions to you why do u always have to slate their thread. Its really silly actually, anyways im sure many people on Blacknet had sex before they were married so i dont see the big deal.
fank u
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browneyedbabe
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Posted: Sunday May 8th, 2005 23:49 |
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| I have one thing to say to you though we live in a culture where sex is all over the place and it may seem that everyone is doing it wait. Wait I say for as long as you can, no matter what the guys say, wait. Wait because your virginity is special, you are special and only someone special deserves it. You will be shocked at when you get older of all the respect you'll get for being a virgin, the men will be beating down your doors but let them wait. You don't know how much power you have over your sexuality girls. You decide not him. Why the rush?
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Mafdet
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Posted: Monday May 9th, 2005 00:05 |
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sierra mami wrote: Backatya wrote: sierra mami wrote: i look at it this way: you were born with your arm, if someone asked if they could have it would you give it to them that easily-knowing that weren't gonna get it back. same with your virginty...
Ammm........Well....not quite!
You were designed to funtion throughout your lifetime with 2 arms.
We were not designed to function throughout our lifetime with our virginity, otherwise the human race would not survive.
Respect
you didn't need to read too deep into what i wrote-it was just an example to put my point across.
@Backatya
Well I guess that told you huh. 
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Mafdet
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Posted: Monday May 9th, 2005 00:12 |
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ladyflaunt wrote: Real Roxanne wrote: Richard whatever your name is how old are u?
Just because people have different opinions to you why do u always have to slate their thread. Its really silly actually, anyways im sure many people on Blacknet had sex before they were married so i dont see the big deal.
fank u
@Ladyflaunt and Real Roxanne
Because people have had sex before married does not mean that you have to do it like its a trend thing.....you don't know the reasons why people lost their virginity and furhtermore you don't know if they regret when how why or who they lost their virginity too.
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Mafdet
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Posted: Monday May 9th, 2005 00:18 |
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*Discrete* wrote: im 15 and im stil a virgin. i go out wiv an 18 yr old boy and iv told him dat i aint redy 2 have sex wiv him. Infact, as stupid as it may sound, iv told him dat i aint havin sex till im married. Dat way, u no dat u r losin it 4 someone truely special. Ne way, dats wat i believ. Fink bout it, if u say dat u r gonna lose it wiv a boyfriend hu u fink is special, ull probaby end up havin sex wiv 7 bf coz each boy dat cums alone in ur life is a special bf. Dats my opinion
It don't sound stupid to me it sounds very sensible you are a rare gem not many around like you that doesn't give in to peer pressure good for you.
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Richard Darial
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Posted: Monday May 9th, 2005 09:43 |
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Real Roxanne wrote: Richard whatever your name is how old are u?
Just because people have different opinions to you why do u always have to slate their thread. Its really silly actually, anyways im sure many people on Blacknet had sex before they were married so i dont see the big deal.
You don't see the big deal because you're either someone who doesn't actually care about these things (in which case you shouldn't be posting repsonses here) or you're too young to realize doing this is a mistake.
Sluts (male and female both) become so either because they're abused by their parents or guardians as kids or because they have no proper parents or guardians and/or are allowed or taught to do whatever they want.
To avoid being either of these you need to follow simple rules. One of them is to get married before you lose your virginity, because if you don't there'll be nothing to stop you thinking the way stupid people do: ie. What's wrong with doing whatever I want?
Oh and guess why adults abuse their own children. That's right. They learned to ignore simple rules from an early age and therefore do whatever they want.
The rules are there to protect you, even if you've already broken them. Being a virgin isn't necessarily about never having sex. It's about how pure you are and if you only ever have sex with one person, who can fault you?
Last edited on Monday May 9th, 2005 09:53 by Richard Darial
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efenjee
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Posted: Monday May 9th, 2005 10:34 |
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| @ Richard Darial: Are you a virgin? Are you married? If you are not a virgin, do you wish you were? If you are married and your wife was to divorce you, would you practice celibacy until you were able to re-marry?
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Richard Darial
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Posted: Monday May 9th, 2005 11:11 |
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efenjee wrote: @ Richard Darial: Are you a virgin? Are you married? If you are not a virgin, do you wish you were? If you are married and your wife was to divorce you, would you practice celibacy until you were able to re-marry?
I wish I would have touched the first girl I wanted to marry and married her. We'd still be together now, regardless of what happens to everyone else.
If your spouse divorces you for any reason other than unfaithfulness, then the divorce is invalid and any further sexual relationships they have are adulterous.
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efenjee
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Posted: Monday May 9th, 2005 11:38 |
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| Richard, I asked you four questions. Could you please answer each one - then I'll be able to see where you are coming from on this topic a little better.
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Richard Darial
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Posted: Monday May 9th, 2005 15:30 |
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efenjee wrote: Richard, I asked you four questions. Could you please answer each one - then I'll be able to see where you are coming from on this topic a little better.
I'd like to see you try to make me answer them.
If you want to see where I'm coming from read my posts.
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Real Roxanne
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Posted: Monday May 9th, 2005 20:53 |
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Mafdet wrote: ladyflaunt wrote: Real Roxanne wrote: Richard whatever your name is how old are u?
Just because people have different opinions to you why do u always have to slate their thread. Its really silly actually, anyways im sure many people on Blacknet had sex before they were married so i dont see the big deal.
fank u
@Ladyflaunt and Real Roxanne
Because people have had sex before married does not mean that you have to do it like its a trend thing.....you don't know the reasons why people lost their virginity and furhtermore you don't know if they regret when how why or who they lost their virginity too.
If u read my other post on this thread u can understand why I wrote that. What I was saying was that Im sure that many people on blacknet have lost their virginity to someone that they loved even though they were not married. When I said I dont see the big deal I actually ment marriage before sex, I am 16 like ive sais before and im not rushing into anything. Im waiting until im ready end of.
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Real Roxanne
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Posted: Monday May 9th, 2005 21:05 |
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Richard Darial wrote: Real Roxanne wrote: Richard whatever your name is how old are u?
Just because people have different opinions to you why do u always have to slate their thread. Its really silly actually, anyways im sure many people on Blacknet had sex before they were married so i dont see the big deal.
You don't see the big deal because you're either someone who doesn't actually care about these things (in which case you shouldn't be posting repsonses here) or you're too young to realize doing this is a mistake.
Of course I care about these things and I will reply to whatever I want to because I am under 18, ARE YOU? I dont see why your making a big deal out of this thread telling people to get married I mean who are you to tell people what to do. As I keep saying Im not in a rush to get married I will have sex when the time is right and when I am ready. I aint a sheep, I aint having sex because everyone is doing it.
Sluts (male and female both) become so either because they're abused by their parents or guardians as kids or because they have no proper parents or guardians and/or are allowed or taught to do whatever they want.
To avoid being either of these you need to follow simple rules. One of them is to get married before you lose your virginity, because if you don't there'll be nothing to stop you thinking the way stupid people do: ie. What's wrong with doing whatever I want?
Oh and guess why adults abuse their own children. That's right. They learned to ignore simple rules from an early age and therefore do whatever they want.
The rules are there to protect you, even if you've already broken them. Being a virgin isn't necessarily about never having sex. It's about how pure you are and if you only ever have sex with one person, who can fault you?
Dont know what this is about.
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Richard Darial
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Posted: Tuesday May 10th, 2005 10:35 |
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Real Roxanne wrote: Richard Darial wrote: Real Roxanne wrote: Richard whatever your name is how old are u?
Just because people have different opinions to you why do u always have to slate their thread. Its really silly actually, anyways im sure many people on Blacknet had sex before they were married so i dont see the big deal.
You don't see the big deal because you're either someone who doesn't actually care about these things (in which case you shouldn't be posting repsonses here) or you're too young to realize doing this is a mistake.
Of course I care about these things and I will reply to whatever I want to because I am under 18, ARE YOU? I dont see why your making a big deal out of this thread telling people to get married I mean who are you to tell people what to do. As I keep saying Im not in a rush to get married I will have sex when the time is right and when I am ready. I aint a sheep, I aint having sex because everyone is doing it.
It's good that you're still relatively innocent (if in fact you are). It's also good that someone older than you can talk to you. Try to understand that anyone older than you has had similar experiences to you (at least with regards to this matter). You ask if I am under 18 and I feel I need to point out (lest you fail to realize) I was.
Now, I know you probably think you know what's best for you more than anyone else and to certain extent, I agree with you, but there are ways to avoid making mistakes in your life. One way is really simple. You just hear what older people are saying.
It's like revising for an exam. If you do it you pass the test. If you don't you're gonna struggle.
Sluts (male and female both) become so either because they're abused by their parents or guardians as kids or because they have no proper parents or guardians and/or are allowed or taught to do whatever they want.
To avoid being either of these you need to follow simple rules. One of them is to get married before you lose your virginity, because if you don't there'll be nothing to stop you thinking the way stupid people do: ie. What's wrong with doing whatever I want?
Oh and guess why adults abuse their own children. That's right. They learned to ignore simple rules from an early age and therefore do whatever they want.
The rules are there to protect you, even if you've already broken them. Being a virgin isn't necessarily about never having sex. It's about how pure you are and if you only ever have sex with one person, who can fault you?
Dont know what this is about.
Okay. Let me try to explain. Depending on who you marry, the main reason marriages fail is that partners are either unfaithful or perceived to be unfaithful (if you marry a white girl she'll leave you if you fail to maintain her excessive lifestyle).
Now. If you and your partner actually know that you and your partner have touched no other person on earth, then you have an advantage over almost every other married couple. You'll trust each other.
Try to think of sex as a skill, learned like any other. IF your teacher was your spouse you'll subconsciously perceive them to be expert; you'll see them as a natural extension of yourself. It would be very difficult for you to leave such a partner, especially if you knew them as a child, grew together, married young, had children. It would be next to impossible for you to look at anyone else, or to be lead astray.
Now conversely, if you learn about sex from causal encounters, you dispense with perhaps the most important component of a marriage. Your prospective partner will either have to put up with the notion they weren't the first; endure the torture of comparing themselves to your past conquests; constantly check to make sure they're good enough or you'll be doing these things if they tell you they had so many partners.
This is what causes the destruction of a relationship. You'll never trust your partner, especially NOT if you enter into a casual relationship and THEN fall in love. That can do terrible things to your mind.
Believe me. It's better to find a virgin, teach her how to make love and stay with her the rest of your life. There can be nothing better than knowing you were her first and you'll be her last.
Last edited on Tuesday May 10th, 2005 10:41 by Richard Darial
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Real Roxanne
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Posted: Tuesday May 10th, 2005 19:39 |
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| Oh lawd, listen I know the in's and out's concerning this subject so I really dont need a lecture cause everyones experiences and encounters are different. I have learned those morals of not being a sheep and yes I listen to elders who speak sense on the subject. People can be married or in a long term relationship and still be open to their partners not being faithful. The reality is that life is not perfect nor is an opinion unless its lived. My family I respect and follow because they do not take issues like these for joke. As for find a virgin and keeping her, what makes you so sure that you would be the only partner she would want for life huh??? Everyone has a mind and are responsible for their own actions even if they decide to have sex outside of marriage. Does not make a person bad or evil now does it. Alot of non virgins go on to have long lasting, healthy relationships. So again spare the lecture because I have more than enough positive relatives to give me sound REAL advice.
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Richard Darial
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Posted: Tuesday May 10th, 2005 20:56 |
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Real Roxanne wrote: Oh lawd, listen I know the in's and out's concerning this subject so I really dont need a lecture cause everyones experiences and encounters are different. I have learned those morals of not being a sheep and yes I listen to elders who speak sense on the subject. People can be married or in a long term relationship and still be open to their partners not being faithful.
IMO those people need help. Allowing your partner to cheat is the equivalent of a woman allowing her man to hit her whenever he feels like it. Only people with loose morals would sit comfortably with such an arrangement.
The reality is that life is not perfect nor is an opinion unless its lived. My family I respect and follow because they do not take issues like these for joke. As for find a virgin and keeping her, what makes you so sure that you would be the only partner she would want for life huh???
Trust me. I'd be enough for her. Plus if she's never had a man before why should she even contemplate having more than one? You talk as if everyone is automatically corrupt. This simply isn't true.
Everyone has a mind and are responsible for their own actions even if they decide to have sex outside of marriage. Does not make a person bad or evil now does it.
It can. See. Sex is one of those things (like drugs) that can have side effects for those addicted to it. When one loosens up sexually there tends to be an overall loosening of morals. It's the easiest way for person to completely corrupt themselves.
Alot of non virgins go on to have long lasting, healthy relationships. So again spare the lecture because I have more than enough positive relatives to give me sound REAL advice.
I'm not lecturing you in particular. You're not really the target here. This is for uncompromised young black people who are still virgins.
You clearly do not fit into this category. Right?
That's why it would be kind of you to bite your tongue from time to time. After all this is all being done in the interests of the young black community.
Last edited on Wednesday May 11th, 2005 02:45 by Richard Darial
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Real Roxanne
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Posted: Tuesday May 10th, 2005 21:37 |
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| U need to read my post properly, not only u take things out of context your so far up your arse your no one to be offering advice like that. If your going to give advice then give it, put down your flipping ego and stop waffling on.
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Richard Darial
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Posted: Wednesday May 11th, 2005 02:44 |
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Real Roxanne wrote: U need to read my post properly, not only u take things out of context your so far up your arse your no one to be offering advice like that. If your going to give advice then give it, put down your flipping ego and stop waffling on.
Why the attitude? Did I say something to put you down? Yeah I probably did.
Let me guess what it was.
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queenbee
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Posted: Wednesday May 11th, 2005 11:36 |
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Virgin or not, along with sex comes responsiblity from not only the physical aspect but mental and emotional. Before engaging into any sexual activities make sure you are prepared to handle any and all aspects that come with it.
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Real Roxanne
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Posted: Wednesday May 11th, 2005 14:44 |
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Richard Darial wrote: Real Roxanne wrote: U need to read my post properly, not only u take things out of context your so far up your arse your no one to be offering advice like that. If your going to give advice then give it, put down your flipping ego and stop waffling on.
Why the attitude? Did I say something to put you down? Yeah I probably did.
Let me guess what it was.
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ladyflaunt
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Posted: Saturday May 14th, 2005 08:33 |
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Richard Darial wrote: Real Roxanne wrote: Richard whatever your name is how old are u?
Just because people have different opinions to you why do u always have to slate their thread. Its really silly actually, anyways im sure many people on Blacknet had sex before they were married so i dont see the big deal.
You don't see the big deal because you're either someone who doesn't actually care about these things (in which case you shouldn't be posting repsonses here) or you're too young to realize doing this is a mistake.
Sluts (male and female both) become so either because they're abused by their parents or guardians as kids or because they have no proper parents or guardians and/or are allowed or taught to do whatever they want.
To avoid being either of these you need to follow simple rules. One of them is to get married before you lose your virginity, because if you don't there'll be nothing to stop you thinking the way stupid people do: ie. What's wrong with doing whatever I want?
Oh and guess why adults abuse their own children. That's right. They learned to ignore simple rules from an early age and therefore do whatever they want.
The rules are there to protect you, even if you've already broken them. Being a virgin isn't necessarily about never having sex. It's about how pure you are and if you only ever have sex with one person, who can fault you?
oh wateva man not evry 1 has da same opinion as u
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cookie#1
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Posted: Saturday May 14th, 2005 11:26 |
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| I say to each his own. At the end of the day a lot of people have sex before marriage and break the law by having sex before 16 (females that is cos there is no age of consent 4 a boy). My mother always told me that as a yopung black woman I should alwayz remember that my body is a temple contain something precious just as with all my posessions I wouldn't just let anyone use them so I shouldn't just let any man use me and break my virginity. Sex is a mature, physical and emotional thing but by having sex you don't become mature. I think that everyone should just make the decision to have sex when they feel they are ready because at the end of the day only you know wot u r feelin. In saying that I don't think people really should start having sex before they are 15 or at least able to talk anout it openly with their partner. If you value, respect and love yourselves that will reflect in the decisions you make.
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Posted: Sunday May 15th, 2005 20:10 |
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| i totally agree wid u CC n i ave been in dat situation.After uv been in a relationship 4 a while n da guy finds out dat u dnt want 2 ave sex wid dem dey r quick 2 leave.At da end of da day if da guy says he loves u as much as he protests he shud be willing 2 wait untill u r ready.
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Posted: Tuesday May 17th, 2005 19:24 |
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"Then you better become religious and change your views, because the way you're talking you'll end up old and lonely. Young people don't realize how quick the aging process actually is... until they do.
IMO only white girls think and talk the way you do."
How DARE you tell her to become religious and change her views?? i don't know how old you are but this wise older person act is pretty disgusting considering your telling an open minded, young person WHAT to think. what she is saying is more than true. waiting is right for some people, for others it isn't. sex is incredible and intimate, but it is also amazing fun. i lost it at the right time for me, although i was quite young, and you had better alert the church elders immedidately as i was only 15... anyway.. i had a relationship with this amazing person for 2 and a half years. it ended as relationships will. it broke my heart into tiny, shattered, seemingly unmendable pieces and i fell apart... but hey look at that.. i recovered and have experienced so much of life without him tying me down. and that includes sex with other people.
and ya know what? sometimes it's JUST sex... as for whatever half wit who said it's like giving away your arm.. just try it. wait for sumone right but realise they won't always be there... so realise u may feel pain eventually.. but everyone needs to experience these things. you may never meet the one and get married.. maybe none of us will... but if i do meet him.. i'm pretty sure he won't be a virgin. so just do it. it is fun, and no woman should ever be judged for experimenting.
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