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Lucas...
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Posted: Friday September 1st, 2006 02:31 |
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mmmmm
personally i dont agree... from what ive seen.. secure... women in a great relationship... have a problem with one dude stating his preference... ladies like.. maf... ashanti jett...etc etc... ive never heard them woo woo... they know bp is just messing.. and even if he wasnt...what is the big deal.. he likes what he likes... who made up this general rule that every one MUST like the same thing.... i would be shame if i felt like i needed to force someone to like my hue... he always talks about lightskin women ban him
pityful...
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Vubundada_Kandaba
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Posted: Friday September 1st, 2006 03:35 |
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Lucas... wrote: mmmmm
personally i dont agree... from what ive seen.. secure... women in a great relationship... have a problem with one dude stating his preference... ladies like.. maf... ashanti jett...etc etc... ive never heard them woo woo... they know bp is just messing.. and even if he wasnt...what is the big deal.. he likes what he likes... who made up this general rule that every one MUST like the same thing.... i would be shame if i felt like i needed to force someone to like my hue... he always talks about lightskin women ban him
pityful...
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Lucas, I never called for BP to be banned, on the contrary I like BP, thinks he's a cool cat. I try to be accomadating of other peoples feelings without compromising my beliefs. I just want a space where everyone feels a degree of comfort. I also never said BP should not like his preferences of high yella. I have been very consistent in all my post. In a previous post on page two(2) of this thread I mentioned that he is a cool cat and will be even cooler if once in a while he starts a thread to accomodate the other sisters. My main concern initially was with the name "Black Power" because the phrase meant something of importance to our history but,alas some people don't see it the way I view things which is perfectly fine and this is how I expect things to be in the real World. We don't all have to agree.
If BP's name was something like Lucas then I wouldn't have an issue being the way I see things I had expect a certain type of behavior from some-one with that type of name just like MarcusGarveyLives. But hey, we live in a free World and what is of importance to me and I consider to be part of our History of Survival and slavery might not mean anything to you at all or the next brother, which is perfectly fine.
I don't play the safety in numbers game where people watch the direction of the current and then try to agree with everyone for fear of being rebuked. I walk the stage and speak my mind with fire and will go against the opinions of the entire BNV village if I believe in something. I am man enough to admit my mistakes if I am wrong, man enough to admit that the next man knows more than me on a particular subject and smart enough to back my opnions with concrete facts and I am not ashamed to apologise if I am wrong. Last but not least I don't do grudges on internet discussions whereby If I dis-agree with someone once then from there on out that person is a target and an enemy for confrontation. I choose and fight my battles wisely and I dictate the time and hour to my opponents therefore making them operate by my rules of engagement. I can dis-agree with someone on one thing and agree with them on another.
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Lucas...
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Posted: Friday September 1st, 2006 03:42 |
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mmmmm
my comments werent directed to you....
mmmm but to his detractors.. callin for his ban.. purely because of his preference
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Aryek
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Posted: Friday September 1st, 2006 03:57 |
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Lucas... wrote: mmmmm
personally i dont agree... from what ive seen.. secure... women in a great relationship... have a problem with one dude stating his preference... ladies like.. maf... ashanti jett...etc etc... ive never heard them woo woo... they know bp is just messing.. and even if he wasnt...what is the big deal.. he likes what he likes... who made up this general rule that every one MUST like the same thing.... i would be shame if i felt like i needed to force someone to like my hue... he always talks about lightskin women ban him
pityful...
What if pityful is your quack theories on the mentality of people you know nothing about based on their reaction to your best friend's colourism. Excuse me are you privy to the lives of Soofresh, me and every woman who's ever complained about BP? Anyone who's opinions changes according to whether or not they're in a relationship or are attracting members of the opposite, is a sad human being. It's not real confidence when your self-esteem is based on who you're dating. That's why some people can't stand to be by themselves for even a second because they'd crumble and fall to pieces without someone telling them how great they are.
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Sooofresh
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Posted: Friday September 1st, 2006 07:39 |
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Kunjufu
couple of more points
you stated that BNV and its Mods never treat people EQUALLY............fair enough........which brings to comedy line 1..............why should people treat BP equal to the next sane black brother?..........surly if you state that members here will not get treated equally then damn right BP is not going to get treated equally to Vunde etc.
also the forum stated that BP is *real*...........comedy line 2......... YET you stated that BP pm to you shows a different character to his on-line posting persona...........so i beg ya which of that shows *realness*.........more like di-polar personality.
and i am glad both of us are irritated, as i will repeat i am not the ONLY ONE that opposes his views, so please lets get that clear, because i have a feeling you going down the roots of *lets give the impression of alienation*
hope that should clear things into how i operate when it comes to a different thinking stratagy.
@Vunde
i never stated i want him banned, i just stated the hypocrisy where one GROWN not a teenger or even eraly 20s with a Kid gets to treat the place like a playground without any form of warning...........damn bro if you was here at the beginning i can tell you hands on heart i was like him BP, but learning process couples with one trillion warnings LOL made me realise that my behaviour is unacceptable, so why oh why is this punk allowed to run amok.........
I am starting to have my suspicion that BP is Kunjfu's nephew!
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Lucas...
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Posted: Friday September 1st, 2006 11:34 |
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Aryek wrote: Lucas... wrote: mmmmm
personally i dont agree... from what ive seen.. secure... women in a great relationship... have a problem with one dude stating his preference... ladies like.. maf... ashanti jett...etc etc... ive never heard them woo woo... they know bp is just messing.. and even if he wasnt...what is the big deal.. he likes what he likes... who made up this general rule that every one MUST like the same thing.... i would be shame if i felt like i needed to force someone to like my hue... he always talks about lightskin women ban him
pityful...
What if pityful is your quack theories on the mentality of people you know nothing about based on their reaction to your best friend's colourism. Excuse me are you privy to the lives of Soofresh, me and every woman who's ever complained about BP? Anyone who's opinions changes according to whether or not they're in a relationship or are attracting members of the opposite, is a sad human being. It's not real confidence when your self-esteem is based on who you're dating. That's why some people can't stand to be by themselves for even a second because they'd crumble and fall to pieces without someone telling them how great they are.
*******
@ayrek....
mmmmm can u show me one place in my post where... i mentioned your name?
no?
to be totally honest... you did not spring to mind here... im talkin about people before your time... as in before you joined..
so.........
?
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Posted: Friday September 1st, 2006 11:41 |
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Lucas you know how these "people" are..
we have discussed this at legnth many times.. bottom line is this whole thread will change nothing so let them vent and lie while pretending to know facts about me and calling names..pathetic creatures....would you respect these "women"?
you probably know more about me then most here but dont expect them to listen to your words of truth... let them have their moment. afterall the internet is a place to vent
but remeber this.. while they are up at the crack of dawn posting rants about me...im catchin much needed sleep.
anyway. hows the training going buddy...you traing chest today?
Last edited on Friday September 1st, 2006 11:45 by
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Lucas...
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Posted: Friday September 1st, 2006 11:52 |
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...yes...
these people are so transparent.... its actually embarrassing....
they are actually the opposite of what they try to claim to be.. all "bravado"
...
mmmmn naw man not chest today is ..
good ol arms...
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Gazelle
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Posted: Friday September 1st, 2006 12:17 |
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Humans never cease to amaze.
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Gmahogany
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Posted: Friday September 1st, 2006 14:59 |
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Vubundada_Kandaba wrote: Fellas, lets be men here and be real and understand why some; if not most of the sisters here are pissed. If Aryek, Sooofresh or any other sisters here starts posting pictures of very light skinned men say for instance Franco Harris
 
and push him as the image of a perfect black man, all of us here would be pissed-off big time. I for one know that I will be really pissed and if said sisters continued pushing these men on thread after thread, sooner or later some of you fellas would be diagnosed with high blood pressure, kidney failure, heart problems, eating dis-orders you name it. So if we men aren't happy with what some sisters do, then why can't we understand that we can't have it both ways and claim we are being real. Real what?
I had expected diasporan Africans to be sensitive to the issue of color, but it seems like people here on BNV are a different breed. I will reference one brother who put it across perfectly. TheDogon Wrote: " can't you just indulge us for once? You have your tastes. We have our own. We aren't trying to find new and exciting ways to hate on each other. It should be obvious why you are getting the feedback that you are. You may not know it, but what you are doing is hurtful. Mayhap you don't know of the past, when "Black" folks internalized "White" supremacist beliefs to associate "good" traits with light-skinned people. It's a hurtful past BP. Please my brotha, try and understand that". This is one reason why I said History is very important and we must always keep looking back at history to remind us of where we are going. This is why I said that we must not choose names and statements of Liberation and Freedom just because we think said NAMES and STATEMENTS are cool and drag said names and statements through the mud.
I think these are excellent points. The fact that BLack women don't promote Franco Harris and his ilk as the ideal Black men, or even SEE his ilk as the ideal brother(in most cases), is the reason that brothers can have the blase attitude some of them have on this topic. I've heard a lot of brothers who swore they wouldn't care if sisters started dating outside their race, to the same degree they do, until it started happening in measurable numbers,lol,(u can show people better than u can tell them, as the old saying goes). I mentioned on another thread, where a very good looking darkskinned dude that I knew,(who got ALL kinds off play from ALL kinds of women), would go ballistic if a sister happened to mention that she found a particular light skinned brother attractive, at one time, and SWEAR it was due to some light skinned, preference. This dude had no problem attracting women, and this was in the general context of a time where dark skinned brothers were "in", which has been the case for a minute, so I know if the situation were truly flipped, mofos would be catching feelings,lol.
From the way my friend reacted, I don't think it had anything to do with his current situation, being in a relationship or not. Plenty of darkskinned brothers of celebrity status like Clarence Thomas, Tyrese,Kanye West ,Wesley Snipes ,etc.will sing the blues(even now when you know they have access to all manner of nookie ) about how back in the 80's NO ONE was checking for them, it was all about Debarge looking brothers, etc. It's STILL a sore spot for them. The time that light skinned brothers were THE thing, was very shortlived. Dark skinned bros, especially with shaved heads have been the rage ever since, and these Negroes STILL can't let it go, so I know if the light skinned Black man ideal ever became standard or prevalent for sisters, different tunes would be sung.
Having said that though, I don't have a problem with BP. I take a lot of what he says as being tongue and cheek,(i'm more likely to respond to misogynistic stuff being put across as serious or scholarly). Even the stuff that he is serious about(that i've read, I don't read every thread or post), doesn't usually bother me enough to respond. If and when it does, I WILL respond.
I actually respect him for being open about his preferences, rather than be the type to talk it one way, but walk it, another way, like SOME of us do. You can't do nothing but respect when someone is straight up about what they like or don't like, or what they are about.I have very strong likes and dislikes,too, so that doesn't bother me in the least. I prefer that, in all areas of life. I know where I stand with people like that, and I know how I need to deal with them, or not to deal with them at all, as the case may be. It's the sneaky, phony,faking the funk, mofos that make me sick to my stomach, and who I'd like to line up against the wall and shoot.
Last edited on Friday September 1st, 2006 15:02 by Gmahogany
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Aryek
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Posted: Friday September 1st, 2006 15:12 |
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Lucas... wrote: Aryek wrote: Lucas... wrote: mmmmm
personally i dont agree... from what ive seen.. secure... women in a great relationship... have a problem with one dude stating his preference... ladies like.. maf... ashanti jett...etc etc... ive never heard them woo woo... they know bp is just messing.. and even if he wasnt...what is the big deal.. he likes what he likes... who made up this general rule that every one MUST like the same thing.... i would be shame if i felt like i needed to force someone to like my hue... he always talks about lightskin women ban him
pityful...
What if pityful is your quack theories on the mentality of people you know nothing about based on their reaction to your best friend's colourism. Excuse me are you privy to the lives of Soofresh, me and every woman who's ever complained about BP? Anyone who's opinions changes according to whether or not they're in a relationship or are attracting members of the opposite, is a sad human being. It's not real confidence when your self-esteem is based on who you're dating. That's why some people can't stand to be by themselves for even a second because they'd crumble and fall to pieces without someone telling them how great they are.
*******
@ayrek....
mmmmm can u show me one place in my post where... i mentioned your name?
no?
to be totally honest... you did not spring to mind here... im talkin about people before your time... as in before you joined..
so.........
?
Well let's see now, how am I supposed to know you're talking about what some people said a year or so ago? Since I'm one of the few women on this thread talking about BP, although I never said that he should be banned, is it not only fair that I would draw that conclusion? No matter, the point still stands that true self-esteem should not depend nor rely on being in a relationship.
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Peacemaker
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Posted: Friday September 1st, 2006 16:05 |
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"Why are some so quick discard and write off Black people like BP’.
He's from Birmingham. That's a good enough reason alone.
He goes to the gym also, which makes him gay.
So naturally adding "Birmingham" and "Gyms" together and then rearranging the letters what are you going to get?
"Rimming Gym Bash".
Which sounds kinda gay.
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YankeeJamaRican
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Posted: Saturday September 2nd, 2006 00:44 |
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Peacemaker wrote: So naturally adding "Birmingham" and "Gyms" together and then rearranging the letters what are you going to get?
"Rimming Gym Bash".
Which sounds kinda gay.
I write this with tears in my eyes...PMSL
Peacemaker, you light up my life, you witty boy, you!
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The Watcher
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Posted: Saturday September 2nd, 2006 02:08 |
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VK and Gmahogany
I think you both seriously don't get the male mindset on such things.
We just don't give a sh*t!
Unless as Lucas says... you ain't getting any. For a dude to focus on another dude who chicks like and then get insecure is such bullsh*t I can't even fathom such a thing. I would conclude he was either a supreme sissy or gay. Naturally you won't believe me, the 2D vision person can't percieve the 3D but it is what it is. The example simply makes no sense when applied to men. Sorry.
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Pele
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Posted: Saturday September 2nd, 2006 02:56 |
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Why are some so quick discard and write off Black people like BP’.
He's from Birmingham. That's a good enough reason alone.
He goes to the gym also, which makes him gay.
So naturally adding "Birmingham" and "Gyms" together and then rearranging the letters what are you going to get?
"Rimming Gym Bash".
Which sounds kinda gay
Peace.........  Nothing to add to this...........
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Gmahogany
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Posted: Saturday September 2nd, 2006 04:30 |
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The Watcher wrote: VK and Gmahogany
I think you both seriously don't get the male mindset on such things.
We just don't give a sh*t!
Unless as Lucas says... you ain't getting any. For a dude to focus on another dude who chicks like and then get insecure is such bullsh*t I can't even fathom such a thing. I would conclude he was either a supreme sissy or gay. Naturally you won't believe me, the 2D vision person can't percieve the 3D but it is what it is. The example simply makes no sense when applied to men. Sorry.
First of all, VK is a male, if I'm not mistaken. Second of all, No one is talking about a man FOCUSING on another dude, or a woman focusing on another woman. We're talking about systematically or consistently being made to feel that in general, your ilk or type is inferior to another ilk or type among the gender that you ARE focused on,within your own race; As a GENERAL thing, doesn't matter if you're getting all the p***y or the dick in the world. I've given you several examples of MEN who to this day,make it a point to:talk,recount, rap about how that made them feel(in spite of the fact that I'm sure they are getting all of the p***y they can handle), and they just got a LITTLE dose of the phenomenon, in comparison to what women experience, so that tells me that the reason it's not MORE of a concern for brothers, is because it hasn't been MADE one, by Black women.
In AMerica, as opposed to outside of it, as The Dogon stated, it HAS been made more of a concern,( Burning Spear mentioned it to me on another thread), and that's probably why African American males, are more likely to show the effects of it, than their bretheren from elsewhere. If women have the power to make men do all manner of things to get our attention and approval, and WE DO, from selling drugs, to buying cars that they think will attract us, it is asinine to think that they all of a sudden are IMMUNE to our preferences regarding physical appearance, don't make note of them, or are not affected by them.
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Vubundada_Kandaba
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Posted: Saturday September 2nd, 2006 06:34 |
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The Watcher wrote: VK and Gmahogany
I think you both seriously don't get the male mindset on such things.
We just don't give a sh*t! Unless as Lucas says... you ain't getting any. For a dude to focus on another dude who chicks like and then get insecure is such bullsh*t I can't even fathom such a thing. I would conclude he was either a supreme sissy or gay. Naturally you won't believe me, the 2D vision person can't percieve the 3D but it is what it is. The example simply makes no sense when applied to men. Sorry.
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Let me see here; is "The Watcher" the guy formerly known as "DrunkMonkey". Go back and read all my posts again and then read the posts by the sisters and then come back again. People like you are hypocrites and will not admit what I said is true, instead they throw up fake bravado; like white suburban gangsta wannabees that talk sh*it but are too afraid to go to jail. Some one once said "sometimes I want to chase fake brothers down, as soon as I spot one" . Read my post again very carefully because I noticed most of the time people don't take time to read what others post.
Last edited on Saturday September 2nd, 2006 06:56 by Vubundada_Kandaba
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The Watcher
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Posted: Saturday September 2nd, 2006 06:58 |
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I understand you're ranting like a b**ch about something or the other... unimportant to me since I never set out to insult you in the first place but if you wish to pursue this amusing line I can follow.
As for fake bravado... if your existence consists of being upset over who women find sexy when it's not you I suggest you go get what is known as "a life" from somewhere and stop being a big baby.
Your argument is like those gays who insist everybody is slightly gay and if you don't agree it's false bravado and you just can't admit it because you're insecure or some other such post modernist claptrap. Pure bollocks.
Until your silly post I had never heard of a man who was upset by what guys women liked. I've never heard in my life anybody complain that women are favouring this type or that type and whinning about such matters. I've never been concerned or even thought of such things. "Boo hoo hoo why don't they like me... women should like people who look like ME only boo hoo hoo" you should feel shame to your bones
Last edited on Saturday September 2nd, 2006 07:05 by The Watcher
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Le Moor
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Posted: Saturday September 2nd, 2006 07:30 |
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Kunjufu wrote: Le moor: Sorry but you need to stop projecting..really!!
On a point by point basis.....
1. As far as I remember the only **perfect human being** is Jesus Christ and as I remember the story they nailed him to a cross over 2000 years ago... In that context I don't ever remember saying or presenting myself as someone without inadequancies, as not being inconsistent or not having any contradictions.... My real life proffession DEMANDS that i remember that point, it is part of job to remember MY inconsistencies and how they can impact on my judgement and actions..So i know you're confusing me with someone else..I don't do that...sorry!
2. Sorry to appear rude but Le Moor, but Ayrek is right, you are using this thread and virtually ever other thread as a vehicle to vent your own spleen on your own perceieved injustice and its getting rather tiresome now really..... Pardon my analysis of your last post..but words like..'humilated''insulted' and 'Bn mentality'....are rather revealling.....
If you'd bothered to read the premise of this thread it was about engaging and discussion with people that we do not agree with, and not writing them off or throwing them away... Therefore your charge that I have been inconsistent rings a bit hollow..as I have done exactly that with you..the forum has done exactly that with you...you are still here to put your view..THATs the WHOLE point!!! NO one has suggested that you be written off...being unkind or using unkind words is NOT the same as saying Le moor ought to be cast into oblivion..come on now!!
3. You then suggest/infer to know what I think...based on what exactly? Did i tellyou I thought I was 'good'..have you ever seen those words or that sentiment pass out of my lips? What i have always said is that Moderationg is difficult and a hard balancing act...I said before the Oct incident, I said it afterwards, I said that on Ligali and accepted if you remember properly that I had made mistakes..yet here you are arguing the opposite..based on what pray tell?
Everyone who has ever taken the job agrees there is no one line, there is no easy answers..its a dilemma every day, we've said that consistent..the problem is Le moor is that you're not listening..
On other point Le moor, i agree the Team here, are influential, however we are NOT here to control people or to TAKE responsibility FOR people.. As Adults I expect people to take responsibility for themselves and own their words and behaviour... So Le moor if you post sometime that is contraversial then you should accept the consequences instead of bleating that I or the other mods should accept that on your behalf...
4. Please please, please...try to comprehend this bit....I do not own the Moderating team, I am NOT their parent nor am I their employer... The team here is purely voluntary...and Whilst I acknowledge that as the oldest and longest serving I have more influence within the team... It may shock you to know this...I don't TELL them what to do or say...My Opinion or Permission is not sought before things are said... and I rarely if ever question the team because THAT is NOT how we work together..
We argue, disagree and have MANY difference on many subjects, the difference is we just don't do it on the open forum...Further the team wasn't chosen because they were YES people..in fact the opposite was and is true...they were chosen for their STRONG opinions and the fact they aren't affraid to give it...and most important that theybhad the maturity to give that view...
5.Last point The Mod team is not here TAKE responsiblity for the CONDUCT of you or anyone else....that is NOT what we do..It will never be WHAT we do... I'm not sure if I can be any clearer on this point.... If the problem is your perception that you feel that is what a MOD is supposed to do...Can I say clearly now you're in the wrong place.. WE SIMPLY DON'T DO THAT!!!
Was it really necessary to write such a long post whinging on about how difficult your role as a Moderators is here. Heard it all before. Such a long post which only displays you still havent grasped EXACTLY what your responsibilitites are here more importantly you have no idea or even stopped to consider EXACTLY how much this forum means to certain individuals....Obviously.............
You're a volenteer....what has this to do with your inability to perform consistently. What has this to do with you allowing an environment to fester which only lends itself to the subject matter of this thread. Can i remind you YOU Volenteered for the role. How would you feel if lets say an elderly member of your family was taken out by a group of care workers and the one who spent the most time with your relative happened to be a volenteer. Would you want that volenteer to pocess an attitude that said "i dont get paid for doing this".....need i expose the need for you to reconsider your mentality with this example any further.
Sorry if i have a problem with your moderating but the way i see things is if you are not capable of forflling a purpose, what exactly is the purpose of you. At the moment it seems like the only person who is benefitting from Moderatering is YOU the moderator yourself. Seems like you use the role for nothing else but to gain leverage for your own opinions. I certainly am not benefitting. Else i would feel that im on a forum where i can truley express my opinions without fear of backlash. Until every menmber here feels the same way then your job is unaccomplished. If you cant appreciate that then resign from the role. Whats the point of doing something that you have no passion, or no sense of feeling for. Sounds to me that you need to ask yourself why do you do this role?. Is it to boost your ego or do you really care about our needs. If its the latter then you will really listen to what im saying FOR ONCE instead of putting my complaints ALWAYS down to me trying to hijack threads to vent my spleen.
Why is that in fact? Here we are on a thread which addresses people being shouted down for their opinions and having to think a certain way in order to conform. Myself and Ladystirer use an example and you choose to forget about the very words you have written in this lead post, and instead take sides with the person who was guitly of the negativety you reffered to earlier.
This is the exactly what i mean about you not taking responsibility for your role and have zero empathic skills. For not understanding that as moderator if that is how it is here you are responsible for that ENVIRONMENT. They are the results you have YIELDED. When i say i you have no idea of the amount of inflence you have here, this is an example. You dont seem to think that its possible to achieve this envirnoment i refer to.
How can you the go on to say that you're not responsible for the way people conduct themselves yet you pocess the power to ban people and you occasionly do....Of course you are responsible for the way we conduct oureselves. Its the KEY component amongst others as to why you do this role. Dress that up anyway you like but you wont convince me that that is what it is when broken down to its most simplistic format. Sounds to me that again YOU ARE UNWILLING TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY.
The words humilated and insulted. Again this is quite telling about your attitude in general. Read the context of how those words were written again. Im afrain they were an example of viewing life as either a half empty glass or half full. You choose to view the words as a half empty glass, in turn choosing to focus on them as some kinda flaw in my make-up.
Need i say anymore......except the very cracks in your persona are the reason we will continue to disagree on this issue.
Last edited on Saturday September 2nd, 2006 08:00 by Le Moor
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Vubundada_Kandaba
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Posted: Saturday September 2nd, 2006 07:48 |
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DrunkMonkey; I repeat People like you are hypocrites and will not admit what I said is true, instead they throw up fake bravado; like white suburban gangsta wannabees that talk sh*it but are too afraid to go to jail. Some one once said "sometimes I want to chase fake brothers down, as soon as I spot one" . Read my post again very carefully because I noticed most of the time people don't take time to read what others post.
I was asking for us the guys to take into consideration what the sisters who wrote here are complaining about. It seems like that rubbed you the wrong way and like fake white suburban gangsta wannabe kids you cried. Be man enough. You just proved my point about fakeness because deep down you know what I wrote is true and it hurt you that is why the fake bravado. I have lived in the west for almost 12 years and I have seen what I am talking about. You on the other hand according to your writing have lived here most of your life and know it all but will still play dumb and stupid.
Read what Gmahogany wrote. I assume you have good reading skills and can read without a dictionary. Now read Gmahogany posts and the examples she gave.
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Le Moor
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Posted: Saturday September 2nd, 2006 07:53 |
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Aryek wrote: Le Moor wrote: @ Aryek. Of course im going bring up the example of the Bluefoot thread. Its exactly what this thread is about.
You still dont geddit. Unfortuanely your insults cut deep with me. Not in the sense of the name calling, more in the mentality that you feel i shouldn't have the right to think for myself and instead fall in line with the BN mentality... I take grave offence to this intimidation, believe, and will continue to.
Humph, last time I checked I wasn't receiving any payment for enforcing this so called BN mentality so why you'd think that I was trying to force you to uphold this mentality is beyond me. Understand that my views are my own, not something I happen to pick up when I enter this forum. They stay with me regardless of what forum or what group of people I'm in contact with. Therefore, I've never intimidated you on these grounds. I just simply do not agree with your stance and said so.
So if you want me to respect you APOLOGISE. Then from here on you will understand that if i ever raise an issue which goes against the grain, it will not be an invitation for you BEGIN the insults as you ORIGINALLY did. It will also point out to you that in order to influence someone with the intelligence you obviously do pocess, you would have to in future take a different approach. That way you will give the individual a chance to learn or admit they have seen things differently, without being humiliated or insulted in the process. Most importantly, it will demostrate you understand that you must open your mind to other opinions BEFORE you decide on whether they hold any credibility or not. It all makes for a more effective environment. Its also whats this thread is about so now demonstrate girl you are a, mature enough to take my offer and b, understand the point being made here.
Alright I shouldn't have insulted you for your view on that forum. I do run a short fuse at times so perhaps I should try for more patience. But as for you respecting me, that really isn't any of my concern, I just want you to stop bringing up past arguments. But I understand the points that you've made here. It doesn't mean that I won't ever clash with you from here on, but I understand why you were angry.
In advance i apologise for my REACTION to you which i know you're going to bring up, so its answered already.
Apology accepted.
Aryek, It is about respect. I accept we cant agree with everyone all the time but its how we engage with each other which is important and sets the right environment. I rarely chuck it with anyone here unless they do first or we have bad blood. Im guilty of that and know it , in fact its got so that im beginning to enjoy it, which is worrying.
However the respect comes in knowing how far you should go with a poster without intentionally offending them and sticking to those standards.
Nuff said line in sand firmly drawn.......
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Posted: Saturday September 2nd, 2006 07:55 |
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I'm a hypocrite for pointing out that you think you're a psychic?
Your example was flawed and foolish, trying to switch a situation by switching genders is clearly illogical given the circumstances. What you are trying to do is attempt to tell men how we think contrary to our own experiences!
Why would I read a woman's perspective on what I as a man think when yours is erroneous enough? How does that make sense? If I'm telling you I've never though XYZ and nobody I know has ever said XYZ how do get about telling me I'm in an XYZ mindset?
Hypocrite? I get fed up of bullsh*t posts like yours telling people not even how to think but telling them what they DO think.
Asking the guys to take into consideration is one thing (albeit a flawed thing since nobody ever does see the other side as you're clearly demonstrating) but that isn't what you did. You said this is what is and you're wrong.
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Kunjufu
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Posted: Saturday September 2nd, 2006 07:57 |
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Le Moor wrote:
Was it really necessary to write such a long post winging on about how difficult your role as a Moderators is here. Heard it all before. Such a long post which only displays you still havent grasped EXACTLY what your responsibilitites are here more importantly you have no idea or even stopped to consider EXACTLY how much this forum means to certain individuals....Obviously.............
You're a volenteer....what has this to do with your inability to perform consistently. What has this to do with you allowing an environment to fester which only lends itself to the subject matter of this thread. Can i remind you YOU Volenteered for the role. How would you feel if lets say an elderly member of your family was taken out by a group of care workers and the one who spent the most time with your relative happened to be a volenteer. Would you want that volenteer to pocess an attitude that said "i dont get paid for doing this".....need i expose the need for you to reconsider your mentality with this example any further.
Sorry if i have a problem with your moderating but the way i see things is if you are not capable of forflling a purpose, what exactly is the purpose of you. At the moment it seems like the only person who is benefitting from Moderatering is YOU the moderator yourself. Seems like you use the role for nothing else but to gain leverage for your own opinions. I certainly am not benefitting. Else i would feel that im on a forum where i can truley express my opinions without fear of backlash. Until every menmber here feels the same way then your job is unaccomplished. If you cant appreciate that then resign from the role. Whats the point of doing something that you have no passion, or no sense of feeling for. Sounds to me that you need to ask yourself why do you do this role?. Is it to boost your ego or do you really care about our needs. If its the latter then you will really listen to what im saying FOR ONCE instead of putting my complaints ALWAYS down to me trying to hijack threads to vent my spleen.
Why is that in fact? Here we are on a thread which addresses people being shouted down for their opinions and having to think a certain way in order to conform. Myself and Ladystirer use an example and you choose to forget about the very words you have written in this lead post, and instead take sides with the person who was guitly of the negativety you reffered to earlier.
This is the exactly what i mean about you not taking responsibility for your role and have zero empathic skills. For not understanding that as moderator if that is how it is here you are responsible for that ENVIRONMENT. They are the results you have YIELDED. When i say i you have no idea of the amount of inflence you have here, this is an example. You dont seem to think that its possible to achieve this envirnoment i refer to.
How can you the go on to say that you're not responsible for the way people conduct themselves yet you pocess the power to ban people and you occasionly do....Of course you are responsible for the way we conduct oureselves. Its the KEY component amongst others as to why you do this role. Dress that up anyway you like but you wont convince me that that is what it is when broken down to its most simplistic format. Sounds to me that again YOU ARE UNWILLING TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY.
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