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UGLY-by constance Briscoe
 Moderated by: Saida.M, safetyblitz, Raven, Miss Brighter Days, LadyDay, Kunjufu, Kibibi, Happiness, Breadfruit, Backatya  

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COLTRANE
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 Posted: Tuesday January 24th, 2006 14:18

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You probably might have seen posters of this book all over the place, anyway I bought the book today ,its called UGLY  and  so far I am un impressed  and looks like the whole white media is up in arms promoting



She hates her mother so much but will keep u posted as I continue to read this book

How come books with stories of a good black family arent promoted like this?

confused3

 



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 Posted: Tuesday January 24th, 2006 14:27

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Constance Briscoe
18/01/2006


As a child, she was beaten and mentally abused by her Mother who hated her looks, yet went on to become one of the first black female judges in Britain. Constance Briscoe's autobiography, UGLY tells us how the injustice she suffered as a child, fuelled her determination to climb to the top in the legal world.

Ten years ago, Constance Briscoe became one of the first female black judges in the UK. She lives in South London with her partner, writer and QC, Tony Arlidge and their two children Martin and Francesca.

Constance’s Story

Odd child out

From the age of 5 Constance was physically and mentally abused by her Mother. Although she had two older sisters and five younger sisters she was singled out and was told that she was constantly told that she was ugly. "Have you looked in the mirror recently? Look at those lips - you didn't get them from my side of the family, that's for sure. Why don't you use them to clean out the blocked sink?"

Mother and Father

Constance's Mother called her Claire, it came from Clear, and Constance says that the name make her feel see through. "My Mother looked more like a film star than a parent. My Father George was good looking too. . . . They came to England in the 50's in search of a good life. But the marriage did not last and by the time I came along in 1957, it was virtually over"

Constance's Father had won the pools and wisely spent his money on a number of properties around South London, which he rented out. "He spent most of his time cruising around in [a silver grey capri] and chain smoking. . . . In the early days after he left, my Mother would persuade him to go to bed with her and, if he fell a sleep afterwards, she would remove large wads of cash from his pockets. It must have been on one of these occasions when she fell pregnant with me"

Violence and wetting the bed

Constance's Mother started a relationship with a man called 'Eastman' who also was sexually abused by her stepfather on one occasion. In fact she took him to Court at 13 to stop him abusing her - it was her first taste of the legal system and would fuel her ambition for a career in the future. But the constant cruelty came from her mother, who not only beat and kicked her, but spat at her and deprived her of food. She would punch her adolescent bosom and pull her nipples to punish her. She inflicted such damage that doctors at first believed lumps in her breasts, discovered when she was 12, were the result of cancer, not cruelty.

One of the triggers for her rages was Constance's bed wetting. Her Mother took her to specialists, who gave her blankets with sensors and alarms to wake her up before she wet the bed, but it never worked. Her Mother would beat her before bed, to deter her from wetting the bed. In the end she made her sleep in her wet and soiled sheets as a punishment.

Ambitions to be a Barrister

Constance made up her mind that she wanted to be a Barrister on a school trip to Knightsbridge courts "I had been promised a helping hand by one of the top lawyers in the land, Michael Mansfield, after a chance meeting on a school visit to a court case."

University

"Only my hopes for the future kept me going. But as the time came for me to think about applying to universities and leaving home for good, my mother's cruelty nearly cost me my chance of happiness." Constance won a place at Newcastle, to study law. When Constance asked her Mother to fill out a grant form, she ripped it up 'Only clever people go to university.'

Constance visited her Mother just before she went to University 'I want you to know that I'm off to university,' I said. 'I also want you to know that I have no intention of ever returning home,' I continued. 'And that I will never speak to you again -- ever -- as long as I live.' 'All I have ever wanted was a mum who loved me, not hated me, loved me.' I'd said it. At last I'd said what I wanted to say. That was nearly 30 years ago -- and I have not set foot inside my mother's house since.

Between 1979 and 1982 Constance remained in Newcastle. In 1983, she qualified as a barrister, having completed one year at the Inns of Court School of Law in London.

"I wrote to Mr Mansfield again to tell him my news, and to ask when I could start my pupillage." He agreed straight away.

Contance's Life now

Now a successful barrister who works as a part-time judge in the crown and county courts. She has written the book to let her children, now teenagers, know "something about their mum", and at the behest of her partner, Tony Arlidge, a writer and QC.

Ugly by Constance Briscoe, to be published by Hodder & Stoughton on January 16 at £12.99



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 Posted: Tuesday January 24th, 2006 15:41

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LOL Coltrane, are you trying to say that this woman should have kept her mouth shut because there are no other "nice" books writen about black families?

Her story needs to be told....there are cruel parents in every race and what her mother did to her was cruel and nasty. Also, the mother's reference to her daughter's typical black features such as thick lips are resonate with some messed up black parents. I think the only reason some black people are so mad about it is because her treatment at the hands of her mother is a reminder of some serious deep seated hatred that black people have of themselves.

I have ordered my copy...can't wait to see whats all the noise about.



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 Posted: Tuesday January 24th, 2006 16:02

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I am not sure if I can get to hecked up about this being some kind of attack on 'Black Families'.  Afterall, on the face of it,  the woman is doing no more than getting some stuff off her chest about her mother.  I can't see there is a necessary much to learn in the wider aspect about the 'black family', just about her dysfunctional family the story of which elicits no interest in me whatsoever.  Furthermore, if the quoted extract is anything to go by, the quality of her writting skills doesn't it make it sound like something I would consider reading for it's pure literary value.

Didn't Joan Crawford's daughter do something similar with a book about her mother?

Respect



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 Posted: Tuesday January 24th, 2006 18:03

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To me in my opinion this lady is not feeling too good or right about her position as "the first black female judge in Britian".  She must feel invisible like so many of our "first" in her position and she is stepping out this current tramatic experience to gain attention on another real life tramatic experience in her life.  This time she will not be the "first" with this past tale experience.  She is with a long list of "similar" problems that continue to manifest through each generation in our community.  An 'invisible' sizable audience to profit monetarily off.  What is new I would say is a judge is writing a book on her "past" problems and not addressing the "current" problems with being the "first" and her family.  Overall, she is doing what she knows best with the situation dealt to her. [url=javascript: document.editor_form.message.value = document.getElementById('text_editor').contentWindow.document.body.innerHTML.replace(re_rn, ' '); document.editor_form.post_reply.value=1; document.editor_form.submit();]Send[/url]



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 Posted: Tuesday January 24th, 2006 23:07

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The last black book I saw posters for on the tube was called 'Bling' and the picture was of a black woman with all the 'iced-out' thing going on. I wanted to tear them down they p'd me off that much.

This poster is eye-catching and fits with the theme of the book but it feels a bit innappropriate in this society. Although on the other hand it would really stand out as a poster and would make people think because it is a little girl that is upset in that picture.



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 Posted: Wednesday January 25th, 2006 00:00

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But I think the most pertinent question is,is she married to an African man??

 

 

Hee Hee

 

 

*Jett exits thread wailing*blktrainers

 

blkcry



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 Posted: Wednesday January 25th, 2006 01:15

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I am told she is allegedly married to a white man...I dont have prrof now ..maybe MGL might have something on her



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 Posted: Monday January 30th, 2006 19:52

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Many rumours circulated within the African community in the early 1980s as to what Ms Briscoe did to secure her prestigious pupilage.  I would rather not share some of those rumours here in case the Commission for Racial Equality close the website down permanently.

Anyone who has actually read about this story in recent days will see that:

1. Some of her siblings deny that Ms Briscoe was abused by her family (see for example, Daily Mail, 28 January 2006) ; and

2. Ms Briscoe's partner is clearly named as Anthony Arlidge QC.





Anthony Arlidge QC 

I hope that assists you.




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 Posted: Monday January 30th, 2006 22:19

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THX MGL

now the latest news is she and her siblings are not in speaking terms due to this book

 

Capitalist Money Madness



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 Posted: Monday January 30th, 2006 22:32

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COLTRANE wrote: THX MGL

now the latest news is she and her siblings are not in speaking terms due to this book

 

Capitalist Money Madness





Actually Contrane..in this case I can quite understand WHY her family is slightly miffed with her.....Even if she was abused as she claims, was it really necessary to write a book and insult her own family in such a public fashion....?



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 Posted: Monday January 30th, 2006 22:45

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@Kunjufu

at first i thought it was a joke until I listened to here  interview which she accepted that there was a rift and some of her family members are not happy with what she wrote

the interview was with  bbc radio 5 live and i was like heeere we go again

give a platform to a black woman with lots of insecurity and self hate and let pple make phone calls

you know sometimes education does not equate to being a role model

trying to post the radio  interview link

 

 



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 Posted: Monday January 30th, 2006 23:43

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Indeed why is she washing her dirty laundry in public. Yes some black people are mentally deranged to even comment negatively on the overt African features of their children.

But why promote the fact within white media/ I wonder if her book offers an explanation as to where her mothers attidude and values were formed and under which circumstances. But as a black women/ speaking about essentially standards of aesthetics within the black community  to a white audience she should present her case carefully and in context.

Of course it took a white man to save from the clutches of black family life and to "make something of herself". As a judge she is probably more conservative than Maggie Thatcher..

The thing is even though she is maybe not promoting it as a typical black family life/ sections of the white media will no doubt make it so.. it has all too subtle a message to me that black family life is tainted and without white intevention will remain so or cannot realise its potential.

Thats the first impression this book gives me. Plus the fact she has a white man makes me really not give a toss about her struggles. She can go to hell. 

 



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 Posted: Tuesday January 31st, 2006 11:20

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... the rumour is that she gained access to the legal profession back in the early 1980s with activities that would put some of African Amercia's finest "adult entertainment industry" performers to shame.

You'll have to visit The EPN message board and ask the executives and professionals there for more information or verification.



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 Posted: Tuesday January 31st, 2006 12:36

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Thank God that Judge Briscoe survived years of abuse to succeed in a White-dominated field.  I have nothing but clp) for her.  Don't care who she is married to.  The insinuation that she got where she is by immoral means is especially sad.  Why can't we just be happy that a Black woman has made it?  I wonder if this thread would have been started had she been a Black man instead.   

As to writing a book to reveal the horrors of her life, I say niceone.gif to her.  Many people, Black and White and in-between, have suffered abuse at the hands of her parents/family.  She's just telling it like it is.  Her story will surely help others who have come from similar backgrounds. 

I wish her continued success and will be looking for her book Stateside. 



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 Posted: Tuesday January 31st, 2006 18:35

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AmeriJamCan wrote: Thank God that Judge Briscoe survived years of abuse to succeed in a White-dominated field.  I have nothing but clp) for her.  Don't care who she is married to.  The insinuation that she got where she is by immoral means is especially sad.  Why can't we just be happy that a Black woman has made it?  I wonder if this thread would have been started had she been a Black man instead.   

As to writing a book to reveal the horrors of her life, I say niceone.gif to her.  Many people, Black and White and in-between, have suffered abuse at the hands of her parents/family.  She's just telling it like it is.  Her story will surely help others who have come from similar backgrounds. 

I wish her continued success and will be looking for her book Stateside. 





Sorry Amerijamcan:I can't agree with you, because there is success and 'success' and the type that is gained by stepping on the necks of your own people is NOT something to be praised, or looked up to..

Lets put this into context My parent would not have won any parents of the year awards....does that mean it is legitimate for me to disrespect them to my work colleagues, to anyone who might use the service i work in or to future employers...and what about my personal responsibility to my siblings who might not want or welcome the type of exposure my revelations might bring...Sorry one word for Ms Briscoe's behaviour...SELFISH..



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 Posted: Tuesday January 31st, 2006 20:35

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Kunjufu wrote:
Sorry Amerijamcan:I can't agree with you, because there is success and 'success' and the type that is gained by stepping on the necks of your own people is NOT something to be praised, or looked up to..


Err, how is this woman's story stepping on her people's neck?confused3 She was abused and is telling her story.


Lets put this into context My parent would not have won any parents of the year awards....does that mean it is legitimate for me to disrespect them to my work colleagues, to anyone who might use the service i work in or to future employers...and what about my personal responsibility to my siblings who might not want or welcome the type of exposure my revelations might bring...Sorry one word for Ms Briscoe's behaviour...SELFISH..

Cmon....there is bad parenting and then there is ABUSE. Thats what happened in her case. She has the right to speak about it as she sees fit. Her siblings might have misgivings about it, but then again what did they do to protect her as a child when they moved out of their house with their mother living a child to look after herself? What i find so amusing is the fact that you are willing to believe her siblings who claim that her abuse claims are all blown out of proportion, yet you doubt her completely or want her to just keep her mouth shut because you are all worried about how bad this will look for black people.:shock: 

Thats just plain naive. What i am getting out of all your responses is that since the media will blow this out of proportion, its her fault for opening a part of her life which is very painful.

Perhaps the media and their representation of black people should be your issue, not someone who has decied to write about their ordeal. And like it or not, she considers Britain as her home. So her story will be told here in the glear of white people.

I think what i am seeing here in this thread is denial....African people world wide have a habit of blaming the victims rather than the bloody criminals.....even in Congo, victims of rape are killing themselves because some oh so sage people don't want to hear it in PUBLIC about what those women have gone through.

All i am saying is, whether the story sits comfortably with us or not, we should not berate victims because they have decided to speak out in public. And thats what you people are doing here.

Child abuse is a SERIOUS issue.....leave racial politics and image out of this.


 



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 Posted: Tuesday January 31st, 2006 20:44

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Mezmerized wrote:

Cmon....there is bad parenting and then there is ABUSE. Thats what happened in her case. She has the right to speak about it as she sees fit. Her siblings might have misgivings about it, but then again what did they do to protect her as a child when they moved out of their house with their mother living a child to look after herself? What i find so amusing is the fact that you are willing to believe her siblings who claim that her abuse claims are all blown out of proportion, yet you doubt her completely or want her to just keep her mouth shut because you are all worried about how bad this will look for black people.:shock: 

Thats just plain naive. What i am getting out of all your responses is that since the media will blow this out of proportion, its her fault for opening a part of her life which is very painful.

Perhaps the media and their representation of black people should be your issue, not someone who has decied to write about their ordeal. And like it or not, she considers Britain as her home. So her story will be told here in the glear of white people.

I think what i am seeing here in this thread is denial....African people world wide have a habit of blaming the victims rather than the bloody criminals.....even in Congo, victims of rape are killing themselves because some oh so sage people don't want to hear it in PUBLIC about what those women have gone through.

All i am saying is, whether the story sits comfortably with us or not, we should not berate victims because they have decided to speak out in public. And thats what you people are doing here.

Child abuse is a SERIOUS issue.....leave racial politics and image out of this.


 


THIS NEEDS TO BE PRINTED OUT AND FRAMED

clp)clp)clp)clp)clp)clp)clp)clp)clp)clp)clp)clp)clp)clp)clp)



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 Posted: Tuesday January 31st, 2006 21:17

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I read a brief article about her in a Saturday newspaper and one question kept coming to my mind...why was she ALLEGEDLY abused and not her siblings? Are her siblings more beautiful than her? All kids wet their beds so why write a book about "My bed wetting as a kid. It's my mum's fault"?

She's a QC so she should know better than cast ALLEGATIONS about her own 72 year old mother in public. And then it hit me - she's cashing on the latest celeb fad. Write about your traumatic childhood with unsubstantiated allegations and flog it for £££££££. I dont think her mum needs this kind of stress at her age.

And she's married to that old duffer? No surprise there - same old story.

 

 



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 Posted: Thursday February 2nd, 2006 18:31

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" ... She has written the book to let her children, now teenagers, know "something about their mum", and at the behest of her partner, Tony Arlidge, a writer and QC ..."

Source: Deirdre Fernand meets Constance Briscoe, Sunday Times, 15 January 2006

I hope that assists all of you. You may care to check the definition of the word "behest".


 






Anthony Arlidge QC - Written at his behest. 



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 Posted: Thursday February 2nd, 2006 18:52

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Mez: In response to your earlier reply..sorry but on this I think you're wrong..If in fact she was ABUSED as a child, then i suggest very strongly that it is at best irresponsible to then rehash and given unwelcome expose to her siblings who clear did not either agree or participate in her book... That in my books is STEPPING ON PEOPLES NECKS...

And as for this accusation of 'protection' that is wholly unfair, clearly it was NOT their responsibility as children to 'protect' Ms Briscoe, and nor should they be punished for the actions of thier parents..that is totally unfair and unreasonable..

Further can i clarify, I do not believe i EVER said that Ms briscoe should KEEP HER MOUTH SHUT.. what i took issue with is the fact that she choose to WRITE about it in a book and then publish it for public consumption..that to me is perverse and an unusually cruel way to behave in any language.. If it was about Ms briscoes need to confront or come to terms with her 'Abuse' there were i suggest other ways she could have achieved this without potentially destroying the lives of her siblings..

Finally just because Ms Briscoe was a victim, it does not give her carte blanc to trample or disregard the feelings of everybody else who ALSO might have been abused but may not have come to terms with the issue as she might have done...sorry but i reiterate my charge her behaviour is the height od selfishness..pure and simple..



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 Posted: Saturday February 25th, 2006 03:43

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Coonstance Briscoe is apparently going to show up on the programme presented by Blacknet's 2004 Aunt Jemima of the Year, Angie Two Planks Le Mar (Saturday 25 February 2006). 

Let's hope Anthony Arlidge QC turns up too, given that the book was written "at his behest".




Will he be in the studio too?





The African Community's answer to Jeremy Paxman


 

 

  



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 Posted: Sunday March 5th, 2006 11:10

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I