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brown*skin
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Posted: Sunday July 11th, 2004 09:25 |
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I just wanted to vent some on my anger and frustration on this board. So here goes.
I put on a lot of weight like seven years ago when I was on the depovera injection. my weight practically trebled when i was on this contraception.
Unfortunately because of the big weight gain at that time of my life I have been left with unsightly stretch marks especially on my upper arms. I am on the verge of suicide because of them.
I look at other black women and think I must be the most unlucky black woman in the world to get these horrible marks.
I just want to know if there is anyone out there that can relate to me?
It is even harder but from what i been told and from what I have read about stretch they are permanent.
i do not mind having in other places on my body but it kills me to have them on my arms. Especially now that it is summer time. i cannot wrear short sleeves tops or sexy tight shirts.
I have lost five stones by the way but losing the weight has not made me feel any better about myself. I feel ugly and scarred. I do not discuss this with any of my friends and family because I am too ashamed of my skin.
I also do not feel like getting up to go to work in the morning beacuse I feel so depressed and weak.
I am single at the moment and feel no one can ever love me with these horrendous stretch marks.
I have tried meeting guys but I know that i would not take it that far to have sex with them. Fear of rejection i think.
Is there anyone out there that can sympathize with me on this issue?
Last edited on Saturday August 7th, 2004 17:34 by brown*skin
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LadyDay
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Posted: Sunday July 11th, 2004 11:42 |
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you are not alone. i often think i am the only one with stretchmarks on my arms. they are also appear on my lower arms. the only thing that gets me are these ones are alot thicker and more noticeable than the ones i used to get elswhere. so i have two different ones. i have the light ones which no-one really notices than i also have the dark ones.
it does effect what i choose to wear and the shops dont make it easy at all. i am trying to deal with them. they have not put my husband off sex so i guess it cant be that bad
have you read teh thread called Bio Oil. many people are discussing issues with stretch marks and if this thing works. look under the health and fitness section and you should find it there. otherwise just enter bio oil in the search and you will be able to find it. my cousin is considering laser treatment -but she got stretchmarks through her pregnancy
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Lalia
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Posted: Sunday July 11th, 2004 14:20 |
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Hi Brown Skin I found something that I hope is helpful to you
http://www.ehow.com/ehow/ehowDetails.jsp?index=1037&id=3358
and this too
http://www.ehow.com/tips_3358.html
Also I have a Beauty regimen I do, in which after I take my shower I apply witchhazel all over and sometimes Rose water then apply olive oil and vitamin E oil bust 1 or 2 capsules rub gently all over my body then apply Burt's Bees Honey and Milk lotion, or Korres Vanilla Cinnamon Body milk, or Carol's Daughter Jamaican Punch Body Jam all over too body and more apply to thighs and butt area those tend to get strength marks easily
It's important to keep Black Skin well moisturized. Even throughout the day I tend to apply lotion on my arms and wherevers needed
I hope that's helpful to you take care and love yourself no matter what..
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The Watcher
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Posted: Sunday July 11th, 2004 14:44 |
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I have them on my shoulders, upper arms and thighs. I grew very quickly, from being one of the smallest of my friends to one of the taller ones. I also put on weight through weights and training.....
They are unsightly but to be honest Im used to them now and they ain't going anywhere. I ain't looking miracle cure or cream because they are there to stay and I can't waste the effort fretting about it.
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Sooofresh
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Posted: Sunday July 11th, 2004 14:52 |
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You do not have to be fat to get stretch marks I am 9 stones and 5ft5 but got stretch marks on my upper arms, and i do not care i wear any top i like, and to be honest that has not deterred guys, maybe it is due to confidence
I think before i bombard you with products, you need to raise your self esteem is important especially if you are feeling sucidel!
my sister has got them as well on her arms and refuses to wear anything and for her wedding she is looking to get laser treatment which is very expensive, but me and my stretch marks are part of my package and do not care less about them
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hush
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Posted: Friday August 6th, 2004 23:30 |
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| Yeah I can relate. Mine came on all of a sudden cos I was put on a high dose of steroids for a medical condition so it actually looks like my skin tore. But like Sooofresh said its about confidence. Guys aren't as shallow as u think they are, & if they are then are these really the guys u wanna be attracting???
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ebonygod
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Posted: Monday August 9th, 2004 01:13 |
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| I kinda find the stretch marks on my wifes belly and breasts attractive. So maybe guys arent as shallow as you think. I personally hasnt met any ladies without stretch marks on some part of their body....so dont worry about it...its natural.
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naija
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Posted: Monday August 9th, 2004 21:52 |
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| Having strectmark's on your arms is not so bad because they are the light ones,my girlfriend has the very thick one on both side of her waist , her thighs is full of strectmarks and she can not wear a mini skirt anymore or a very low cut pants ,she is very careful of the lenght of the tops she wears they have to be very long and sometimes its very depressing for her exspecially in the summer. Last edited on Monday August 9th, 2004 21:53 by naija
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brown*skin
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Posted: Tuesday August 10th, 2004 10:25 |
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I know that any guy that comes around me and is turned off by my stretch marks isn't worth having around.
But the truth is that I am more concerned about how it affects me and my self-confidence. And I must say it has definitely destroyed my self confidence. Most of the time I do not feel like leaving the house. 
I see loads of girls with stretch marks on their arms wearing revealing clothes like no one is going to notice the marks except them but I can never see myself doing that.
I also think that mine looks worse than anyone else's. I have visited two dermatologist so far and both have said that they are hardly visible (they are light)but to me everyone can see them.
How do you ladies deal with stretch marks especially when the weather is hot? I try and dress sexy but not revealing but inside I feel like sh*t.
I am so depressed because of them and I keep thinking why did this have to happen to me. And it is amazing that some people do not have any. 
I also think that people in the office where I work look at me and wonder why I never wear sleeveless tops esapcacially in the summer considering I am a size 10. Am I paranoid? Overeacting.
Last edited on Tuesday August 10th, 2004 10:30 by brown*skin
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BlackBeauty
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Posted: Tuesday August 10th, 2004 23:02 |
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brown*skin wrote: I know that any guy that comes around me and is turned off by my stretch marks isn't worth having around.
But the truth is that I am more concerned about how it affects me and my self-confidence. And I must say it has definitely destroyed my self confidence. Most of the time I do not feel like leaving the house.
I see loads of girls with stretch marks on their arms wearing revealing clothes like no one is going to notice the marks except them but I can never see myself doing that.
I also think that mine looks worse than anyone else's. I have visited two dermatologist so far and both have said that they are hardly visible (they are light)but to me everyone can see them.
How do you ladies deal with stretch marks especially when the weather is hot? I try and dress sexy but not revealing but inside I feel like sh*t.
I am so depressed because of them and I keep thinking why did this have to happen to me. And it is amazing that some people do not have any.
I also think that people in the office where I work look at me and wonder why I never wear sleeveless tops esapcacially in the summer considering I am a size 10. Am I paranoid? Overeacting.
All I can think to say right now is @ least u have two arms (with or without stretch marks) because some ppl dont and they STILL have to wear clothes with two sleeves...(hope that didnt come across as rude).
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hush
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Posted: Thursday August 12th, 2004 15:34 |
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| Hey brown*skin do u have any other health problems apart from tha stretchmarks?? Cos if u dont u go a lot to be thankful for trust me!!! It seems to me that ur issues are not with your stretchmarks. U seem to be depressed and lacking self confidence and I dont think the removal of your stretchmarks would fix this. I don't mean this in a bad way but maybe u should seek some counselling. Maybe if u spent some time with people less fortunate than yourself you would realise how good you've got it. Try and cheer up.
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TahlibaBiko
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Posted: Thursday August 12th, 2004 17:29 |
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How much did you weight initially? How quickly did you loose that 5 stone?
loosing weight quickly and to much of it can also cause stretch marks.
Have you tried doing weights to tone up your arms? It may reduce them. And depending on how much you now weight you could consider putting some weight back on...Maybe you went to far?
Without sounding harsh, I think you should be more concerned about the other side effects of the contraceptive you were using...Can't believe sisters are still taking that sh*t...as someone said be grateful you have two arms and just get over it.
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*$HaNnY_Bu*
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Posted: Thursday August 12th, 2004 17:56 |
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I HAVE STRETCH MARKS! I HAVE THEM ON MY BOTTOM (RECENT, WITHIN A YEAR), THE TOP OF MY LEGS, THE SIDES OF MY PELVIS AREA AND BREASTS! IM ONLY SUXTEEN, BUT IVE HAD THEM FOR YEARS NOW, COZ I DEVELOPED REALLY FAST! IM ONLY 5FT2/3! IM ALSO ONLY A SIZE 8 AND DNT UNDERSTAND WHY I HAVE THEN! YES IT PROBABLY IS BECOZ OF I WOZ BOUT A SIZE 12/14 WEN I WOZ YEAR 7! THE THING IS THE 1'S ON MY PELVIS AREA R THOSE DARK 1'S AND I WANT TO FIND A WAY TO TONE THEM DOWN! CAN NE1 HELP?! 
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LadyDay
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Posted: Thursday August 12th, 2004 20:01 |
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naija wrote: Having strectmark's on your arms is not so bad because they are the light ones,my girlfriend has the very thick one on both side of her waist , her thighs is full of strectmarks and she can not wear a mini skirt anymore or a very low cut pants ,she is very careful of the lenght of the tops she wears they have to be very long and sometimes its very depressing for her exspecially in the summer.
stretch marks on both upper and lower arms are bad. especially when they are darker than your skin and you are not exactly blue-black and they stand out, mines look sore urgh cant stand them.
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brown*skin
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Posted: Friday August 13th, 2004 08:11 |
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I must admit that the ones I have are quite light they some-what blend in with the color of my skin. They are not dark. They are only visible in harsh lighting but I still HATE them.
I wish I didn't have them and yes Stretch marks are my only issue. I am happy with the shape I am and my body in general but I feel my body has been spoiled by these horrible critters. I guess it is a case of who feels knows it.
And another thing that really gets me is that i have none on my legs or bottom as many people seems too have, so why the hell did they come on my arms of all places. I do not get it.
Last edited on Friday August 13th, 2004 08:19 by brown*skin
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Sass
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Posted: Tuesday August 24th, 2004 02:06 |
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@brown*skin
I feel for you and i just wanted to say a few things which hopefully will help you to feel better. Firstly, black men are accustomed to stretch marks, there are very FEW black women who actually escape the curse of stretch marks , and most of us also have complexes about them. I am and always have been a petit size 8, yet i still have stretch marks on my BUTT of all places, try whipping out some g-strings or thongs and attempting to be sexy when ur butt looks like a zebra! needless to say, i dont go there, i have never let anyone see that part of my body, as hard as it is to keep it covered up at all times (unless its dark) i do it! The worst thing is that my butt is actually SMALL, I could understand if i had a typical black/african backside but i havent. i guess its just an unevitable part of growing. The second thing i wanted to make you aware of, although i appreciate what you're going through and am in no way trying to trivialise it, is this: i often find myself complaining about things i choose to dislike about myself, (including the stretch marks) a bit of fat starting to acuumilate on my stomach, puffy tired looking eyes, periodic bad skin etc. that was untill i saw a programme on tv a few weeks ago which featured a woman who had No face . i could have slapped myself and i felt so ashamed after watching that programme. here was this woman who had gone from being what one would consider to be 'a normal person' to being a woman who through a tragic accident had lost her entire face, and there i was not too long ago, moaning about what i now consider to be ridiculous insignificant things. That woman would probably give the world to only have stretch marks on her arms, or on her butt. I now appreciate everything i have even if its not perfect and i praise God that i have a complete and fully functioning body, that i even have a body! i hope this helps you to realise what you have.
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Miss Brighter Days
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Posted: Tuesday August 24th, 2004 13:25 |
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Brown skin - stretch marks are indiscriminate, they appear wherever your skin has been over strecthed, be it through growth or weight gain.
Most women have them somewhere, and the arms aren't that bad. When you have kids (if you haven't already) it will most probably be your stomach. But that's just life. You should try to focus on other things. Because fretting about it, is not going to help. You are ruining your self confidence by focusing on something you cannot change.
I have strecth marks on the backs of my upper arms, and on my waist.
I was a tall teenager, and i went through growth spurts, so i just got used to them. It would be nice if they weren't there, but no guy has ever complained about me having them, i'm actually quite sure they don't even notice.
Listen I know this is a big deal for you, but the only one who can stop it from being a big deal is you. Everyone on here has said they have stretch marks too. So at least you are not alone.
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naturalnice
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Posted: Thursday August 26th, 2004 22:39 |
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why not send an email to info@naturalresource.net
The Natural Resource consultancy have a skin care/rejuvenation programme which uses Papaya Oil.
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MsPnutt
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Posted: Sunday December 5th, 2004 18:47 |
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i hit puberty, hard and fast... hence the marks on my ass and upper front thighs. i dont sweat it as life could be a lot worse, i did survive a life threatening car accident and subsequent surgery that left me with a long scar on my side.
but i still bust out my bikini on the beach, have no problems bein naked, etc.
u need to put things into perspective... ppl have continously told u its not noticable, i think ur problem is more of a psychological one, u have a distorted sense of what u look like.
counselling might help, u need to find the root of ur discomfort. and then u can start tryin skin remedies. raw shea butter, bio oil, etc. they do help as i use them.
even if they go away u will find something else to hate, so seek help first to wrk on the inside.
good luck.
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shesheshe
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Posted: Tuesday January 11th, 2005 22:35 |
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| My skin was flawless and then I lost alot of weight rapidly and then regained nearly triple what I lost and that's when all of mine started appearing. Trust me brown sugar you are not alone. There is this procedure called microdermabrasion, it is costly but the results look good. I think the best thing to do is to just drink plenty of water, make sure your getting enough vitamins and protien and exfoliate your skin-daily, maybe considering microdermabrasion and aply plenty of moisturiser to prevent dryness. Mine seem to be fading and i've got 6 months to go till da summer!
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Blackthought
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Posted: Tuesday February 15th, 2005 15:24 |
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Get over it, I have them on my biceps so what, ppl say its becuase I use to pump weight, but i think its all bullsh*t, but it would stop me from wearing my vest in summer, infact i don't even think of it as an issue, not unless u r covered in them all over ur body.
Almost 5/10 ppl in world has it, so why should it be considered an issue.
Just be grateful that there u r healthy and well, what about ppl that have half of their face burnt, how do u think they will feel reading threads like this. No offense to anyone.
I don't mean to sound harsh.
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Ahmaad
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Posted: Wednesday February 16th, 2005 03:35 |
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I know a few women...BLACK WOMEN...who use liquid tanning lotion for thier stretchmarks.
It darkens the skin but apparently evens the tone.
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Subedei
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Posted: Saturday February 26th, 2005 07:36 |
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Has anyone else experienced the pain when they first develop? That caught me off guard as I didn't know what was going on.
Anyway, if strategically placed, I find them attractive. I call them tiger stripes.
I think you might notice them more than anyone else.
And Lalia, I sure would like to get next to you. You must smell some good! ummmmm uhmm!
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alma2254
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Posted: Thursday March 3rd, 2005 20:54 |
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Subedei wrote:
Anyway, if strategically placed, I find them attractive. I call them tiger stripes.
LOL, I love that ! I think I heard someone call them body lightening in another forum!
*huge hugs*
I think stretch marks are no big deal....really. You'd be surprised who has them but hides them well! Infact, I'm convinced every woman has some somewhere.
moisture, moisture, moisture... vitamin E and aloe vera is so soothing!
Last edited on Thursday March 3rd, 2005 20:56 by alma2254
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LadyDay
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Posted: Friday March 11th, 2005 18:41 |
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