| Author | |
|---|
Soul_Lost
Villager
| Joined: | Thursday December 30th, 2004 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 34 |
| Photo: | |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: |  |
Click here for your Black Profile
Search for Black Sites
|
Posted: Thursday December 30th, 2004 23:13 |
|
I am of Nigerian decent and was born in London whilst my mother was resident within the country, she then left the country to return to Nigeria and left me within the care of a lady as a private and temporary arrangement, until she returned.
she never returned.. and for over 18 years i have stayed within the care of the kind lady who has cared for me all this time and religiously recieved every birthday and christams a card from my birth mother wishing me the best and expresssions of love and prayers, however she has never ever given me a contact address or phone number or left any means in which she can be contacted or traced.
At the moment i am worrying about her, and i know it may seem petty and stuipid but i am very concerned as i have not recieved a christmas card from her or any type of mail, the last time i recieved contact from her was a birthday at the beggining of the year, and for her this is very unusual, as for over 18 year she has been so consistant, a week before christmas i would recive a card, and becouse this is the only type of contact i have with her i cannot trace or find out whether she is ok.
The situation is made more complicated as i have a brother who shares the same parents, a brother of which i have been informed by my mother through letters and cards, also lives within the uk with a women who cares for him in such the same situation i am in. However he is now in contact with our father and lives with our father. Both of them i have never been in contact with or ever met. My father is not named on my birth certificate but was named to me by my mother in one of her letters.
In her last letter she asked me to contact my brother and apologised for any hurt she may have caused me, saying she prays every day that me and my brother will find oneanother and i would not make in my life mistakes she has made. she told me he studied at the university of kent, i contacted it and it was a dead end
I have tried finding my brother and father to no avail, and i am wondering is there any point, by what she says im pritty sure they will know that in the great scheme of things i exist and by what i have found out about my father he is a very rich and powerful man both in the uk and nigeria, and if he has found his son in my mind he can find his daughter, i just dont know if im trying to find people who dont care and dont want ot be found.
I posted a request on a nigerian find people board and recieved a promissing reply, however he stated that before he could help me,i needed to supply my address phone nubas, date of birth, place of birth, mothas full name and a lot of perosonal information, i asked y it was needed and how if he knew my father, becouse i was not gonna supply that sort of infromation to someone i do not know, and someone who contaced me via the internet to recieve it, i told hime i knew he needs to know in genuine but i need some reasurances, he repplied with a very rude email stating that he refused to help me and that if i ever contacted him again he would have me done for email stalking as he know people in high places and i was worned i dunno i feel like im fightin a loosin balle was i wrong am i wrong in all this
Last edited on Thursday December 30th, 2004 23:14 by Soul_Lost
____________________
Click here for your Black Profile
|
Soul_Lost
Villager
| Joined: | Thursday December 30th, 2004 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 34 |
| Photo: | |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
Click here for your Black Profile
Search for Black Sites
|
Posted: Thursday December 30th, 2004 23:20 |
|
what i am asking my brothas and sistas is does anyone know how to find someone in the uk or in nigeria, who i would go to? how i would go about this?
I just want to know if my mother is safe and well and whther my brotha is safe and well
____________________
www.blacksearch.co.uk - Helping to promote Black African and Caribbean Websites
|
blaklikeme
Villager
| Joined: | Thursday December 9th, 2004 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 269 |
| Photo: | |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
Click here for your Black Profile
Search for Black Sites
|
Posted: Friday January 7th, 2005 02:29 |
|
| Sorry to hear about your lost relatives soul_lost. Unfortunately I know nothing about tracking a lost relative down. This is a long shot but have you tried contacting a TV show like the Trisha show if your in England. That will find the person if there in Englalnd but u may have to wait and be united on the show.
____________________
Click here for your Black Profile
|
canerow
Villager
| Joined: | Thursday October 14th, 2004 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 99 |
| Photo: | |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: |   |
Click here for your Black Profile
Search for Black Sites
|
Posted: Friday January 7th, 2005 03:29 |
|
oh dear, well as it was private arrangement there are no official records, hmm dont no much about this at all, i'd try posting in all the national papers and also black newspapers some have sections in them for people seeking a relative. Did the person who was your carer get paid ? sorry to ask, but if she did via bank transfer, maybe theres way of locating the area of the bank in Nigeria, which would give you clues to her location. Just a wild guess i dont know if its possible.
wish i could help more, good luck on your search and get some peace of mind
____________________
www.blacksearch.co.uk - Helping to promote Black African and Caribbean Websites
|
Guest
| Joined: | |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | |
| Photo: | |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
Click here for your Black Profile
Search for Black Sites
|
Posted: Friday January 7th, 2005 10:48 |
|
Sometimes people loose themselvs for a reason
It may be best to let It go
____________________
Click here for your Black Profile
|
MsPnutt
Villager
Click here for your Black Profile
Search for Black Sites
|
Posted: Saturday January 8th, 2005 23:27 |
|
@ BP come on bro.. u know its gonna be hard to do that... tut tut...
@ soul-lost.. if u have the names of ur mother, brother and father, u could try going to the nigerian consulate and find out if they are able to help you.
wat about the family who took care of you, i'm sure they must know something.
you could post adverts in black papers and websites, if u know what tribe ur parents are from you could also do a search on uk websites that cater for these tribes and post ur ad there.
my father is nigerian, and used to be part of the govt... i could ask him of other productive ways for u to commence ur search and will post my findings for you.
one more thing, if u do find them, be prepared for disappointment because they may turn u away, so just prepare urself for the best and the worst my dear.
goodluck and takecare.
____________________
www.blacksearch.co.uk - Helping to promote Black African and Caribbean Websites
|
brownsuga21
Villager
| Joined: | Tuesday January 11th, 2005 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 36 |
| Photo: | |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
Click here for your Black Profile
Search for Black Sites
|
Posted: Friday January 14th, 2005 10:58 |
|
thts v sad, i dont kno what to suggest as i am astranged from my biological father but our situations ar quite different. i hope u strong and independant as your situation demands allot of courage, i would keep searching for tyour parent/s as until they specifically say 'i dont want to kno u' u still hav a chance. dont let pompus insensitive b*****ds get u down, its always the opressed that r the opressors.
your journey eill b long and challenging but life for us black people has neva been easier, we r fighters, w r warriors, we r soilders.
one luv
____________________
Click here for your Black Profile
|
Guest
| Joined: | |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | |
| Photo: | |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
Click here for your Black Profile
Search for Black Sites
|
Posted: Friday January 14th, 2005 11:25 |
|
LoL
whos the insensitve b**tard??
LoL
me?
____________________
www.blacksearch.co.uk - Helping to promote Black African and Caribbean Websites
|
free
Villager
| Joined: | Tuesday July 13th, 2004 |
| Location: | Dodge City, Tonga |
| Posts: | 1025 |
| Photo: | |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
Click here for your Black Profile
Search for Black Sites
|
Posted: Friday January 14th, 2005 16:23 |
|
you could try
http://www.findaparentorchild.co.uk/
I am estranged from my father but I recently found out that I have 2 sisters, and a brother... so I do understand your need to know...
But...
give it a great deal of consideration... because you might not like what you find...
____________________
Blacknet Book Club coming soon...
____________________
Click here for your Black Profile
|
Bredder Tukoma
Villager
| Joined: | Saturday February 21st, 2004 |
| Location: | United Kingdom |
| Posts: | 3143 |
| Photo: | |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
Click here for your Black Profile
Search for Black Sites
|
Posted: Thursday January 20th, 2005 00:50 |
|
Soul Lost
Hmm judging by that email you received you are right to be careful of people out to capitalise on your situation. You made a right move there not revealing your details.
Sorry I cant give you any more help. Other than good luck.
____________________
www.blacksearch.co.uk - Helping to promote Black African and Caribbean Websites
|
Saida.M
Super Moderator
| Joined: | Tuesday November 11th, 2003 |
| Location: | RACIST UK |
| Posts: | 3963 |
| Photo: | |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
Click here for your Black Profile
Search for Black Sites
|
Posted: Thursday January 20th, 2005 10:02 |
|
I found an address that you might find useful,
http://www.tracesmart.co.uk
Also, Why not do a google search for any trace/missing people type bureau (sp?), that may operate in your area.
good luck!
____________________
People readily believe lies before they believe the truth
"One of the heads of the beast seemed to have been fatally wounded, but the wound had healed. The whole earth was amazed and followed the beast".
Good News Bible. Rev. Ch.13 V.3
____________________
Click here for your Black Profile
|
J-Lo
Villager
| Joined: | Wednesday January 12th, 2005 |
| Location: | London, United Kingdom |
| Posts: | 28 |
| Photo: | |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
Click here for your Black Profile
Search for Black Sites
|
Posted: Thursday January 20th, 2005 10:34 |
|
@Soul_Lost, like @BP said some ppl lose themselves for a reason, most often they DO NOT want to be found! I'd say it's best to try and let go, from what i gather your brother is with your father, a powerful man in the UK and in Nigeria...Hence they've more chances of finding you than you could ever have of finding them...and so if they haven't done looked for you by now, sorry gurl but there might be a reason.
Keep trying, for the sake of your peace of mind, but dont beat yourself up over it, and dont worry, if they want to be found, you'll be reunited someday....Godspeed girl
____________________
"There is nothing worse than agressive stupidy" Wolfgang
""It is dangerous to let someone else take responsibility for your choices. BUT It is more dangerous to take responsibility from others, by not allowing free choice!" -ken saxton
____________________
www.blacksearch.co.uk - Helping to promote Black African and Caribbean Websites
|
Soul_Lost
Villager
| Joined: | Thursday December 30th, 2004 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 34 |
| Photo: | |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
Click here for your Black Profile
Search for Black Sites
|
Posted: Thursday January 20th, 2005 18:18 |
|
Hey, i would like to say a big thank you to all of the people who repplied to my post and give opinions and advice no matter how positive or negative they may be, i will try those links people gave me and let you know if anything comes up from them
Well i had a conversation with my mother ( the women who has looked after me all this time) And she told me that a nigerian women who knows my father and mother once told her that she wouldnt be suprised if my father did not know i exist, apparently he has had verious women and has more children knocking about than even she would care to imagion.
My mother as much as i wish her no harm, or badness of thought obviously does not want to be found, she never leaves a contact address or place in which she can be contacted or i can write to her so my hopes of finding her are nill, and to be honest i truely have come to relaise that she has made it very difficult to even consider finding her with the lack of information she has gave on herself.
But whether my father knows or not of my existance or my mother wants to be found i am owed a lot of answers from them both, whether i get them or not who knows but i will try, in one of my mothers letters she saide she was very sorry and hoped and prayed me and my brother found one another and didnt make the mistakes she had made, all i know is i wanna know who i am and o do that i need to find the missin piece
____________________
Click here for your Black Profile
|
|
|
Current time is 00:30 | |
|
