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BlackMatta
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Posted: Monday October 25th, 2004 19:13 |
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Kunjufu
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Posted: Monday October 25th, 2004 19:20 |
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Blackmatta: to be honest I would want to get up and move, I would even think about it..but in the end i wouldn't move... The guys self esteem is probably shot to pieces already.. I'm not going to add to it by running from him like a leaper...
others may disagree but that me..
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facetygal
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Posted: Monday October 25th, 2004 19:32 |
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| I used to work in an optician so I came across people from all walks of life. This guy came in one time, he looked perfectly normal except for his eyes.................................. they were bulging out of his head. You ever see that black woman on the guiness book of records? Well this guy was like that, only permanently. When he came in all my colleagues quickly found something to do, so I was left on the shop floor to deal with him. It didn't bother me one bit, I looked him straight in the face and talked to him as I would talk to any other person. Just before he left he thanked me. Now I could have acted like my colleagues and ran away, pretended to find something else to do but why should I? You have to think of it like this: if u had a condition how would u want people to treat u? Your still the same person, ur a human being, so how would u feel if someone looked at or treated u like u were a UFO? The same applies if I passed someone in the street, theres this guy that I see all the time, his face is disfigured for what reason I don't know. But if he passes me I don't turn my head I keep looking straight and if we make eye contact it's all well and good.
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MissC
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Posted: Monday October 25th, 2004 20:05 |
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I think like Kunjufu i would want to move but wouldn't because it wouldn't be a nice thing to do. i would try and compose myself and sit through until it was time for me to get off.
i'm sure he's very aware of his problem and so doesn't need such unkind reaction from people. it must have taken a lot of courage for him to be out in the first place and so i wouldn't like to be one of those people looking and make faces.
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Sage
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Posted: Monday October 25th, 2004 20:16 |
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@ Blackmatta
I'd choose the latter as well, (after thinking about moving of course), especially if what the person has appears to be contagious...but surely if that were the case, the person wouldn't be allowed on public transportation or they themselves wouldn't want to put innoncent folks at risk .....from experience, the self-esteem of people with visible disabilities is in part connected to how others react to them upon seeing their scars and life saving attachements they have to carry around with them like breathing machines and pumps, etc... They become very self-conscious because they are aware that others are reacting to what they look like.
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Happiness
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Posted: Monday October 25th, 2004 20:17 |
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| @ Black Matta - I would have stayed...only because I would have been too embarrassed to get up and move to another seat. So I would have stayed and just prayed to God that whatever he had wasn't catching.
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Kunjufu
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Posted: Monday October 25th, 2004 20:28 |
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| LMAO..@ H.....
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Black_power
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Posted: Monday October 25th, 2004 21:03 |
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Why didnt you ask about the sickness?
Im sure he would hae preffered to answer your questio rather than you looking at him like a freak
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The Watcher
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Posted: Monday October 25th, 2004 21:11 |
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| I would have got off at the next stop and jumped in next carriage or waited for next train, wont upset him but get me away from I dunno what....
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sista girl
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Posted: Monday October 25th, 2004 21:54 |
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Happiness wrote: @ Black Matta - I would have stayed...only because I would have been too embarrassed to get up and move to another seat. So I would have stayed and just prayed to God that whatever he had wasn't catching.
I probably would have done the same. Then changed my clothes and showered as soon as I got home otherwise it would have played on my mind.
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Mafdet
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Posted: Monday October 25th, 2004 22:15 |
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| My first response would have been to just sit still next to him and pray that he got off the next stop I'm not going to lie...contagious or not nobody wants flakes on them. But I'm not too sure now about this look that he gave you back like he didn't expect anyone to sit next to him. I have a friend who has a disfigurement and is so used to being starred at but out in public she doesn't bat an eyelid and just goes about her way. Because of this I would've got paro and think did he not expect anyone to sit next to him because what he got is contagious even though it could be because he is not used to people sitting next to him. I do think there are some ill people just as cold as onlookers can be and wouldn't care about walking in public with a contagious disease so just for that look alone that came back from him I would've done like DrunkMonkey and got off the next stop......and start my journey again, then pray I don't bump into him at my proper stop ha ha.
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Fredblack
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Posted: Monday October 25th, 2004 22:56 |
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@ Agree with Kunjufu. My instincts would want me to move but upbringing about how you react to sick people or the disfigured or hideously ugly would I think prevent it because of what has already been mentioned by Kunjufu and Ashanti/Happiness et al.
Unless he stunk....then I would have to reconsider. But historically I would just ride it out rather than to make the person feel bad. My mother would tear our arses out asr kids for that kind of stuff as being unkind...or extremly insensitive
FB
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sista girl
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Posted: Monday October 25th, 2004 23:19 |
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Last edited on Tuesday October 26th, 2004 00:30 by sista girl
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Geoff
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Posted: Tuesday October 26th, 2004 01:08 |
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@All....
I am warmed and reassurred by your responses.....assuming of course that the offending person was of the caucasion persuasion and not dripping along with the flakes.It is nice to know that basic humane compassion would come into play...
For me...the embarrasment of moving would outwiegh the staying put...and reason would say it better that I should sit it out....hoping he would leave soon...I would do nothing to make him feel bad...would possibly make idle conversation...to reinforce my "relaxed" attitude...and possbly make it worse (dont normally strike up conversation on trains)....I tend to be more relaxed around "odd" people....( a reflection on myself)
Geoff
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Happiness
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Posted: Tuesday October 26th, 2004 01:30 |
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Geoff wrote: @All....
I am warmed and reassurred by your responses.....assuming of course that the offending person was of the caucasion persuasion and not dripping along with the flakes.It is nice to know that basic humane compassion would come into play...
For me...the embarrasment of moving would outwiegh the staying put...and reason would say it better that I should sit it out....hoping he would leave soon...I would do nothing to make him feel bad...would possibly make idle conversation...to reinforce my "relaxed" attitude...and possbly make it worse (dont normally strike up conversation on trains)....I tend to be more relaxed around "odd" people....( a reflection on myself)
Geoff
@ Geoff- oh the guy was white??? - dang...that changes matters...Im outta there pronto!!!!  LOL! Just having fun with you Wet dog...dunno why you had to make that comment though. Funny how none of the black posters even mentioned race but you did
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Sage
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Posted: Tuesday October 26th, 2004 11:02 |
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@ Geoff
I'd like to know what race has to do with this too, so could you please explain what you meant by this remark?... I am warmed and reassurred by your responses.....assuming of course that the offending person was of the caucasion persuasion
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Maat
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Posted: Tuesday October 26th, 2004 12:20 |
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Hey BlackMatta,
I would have stayed, simply because the way events unfolded as you observed, I probably would have felt bad to get up and move away from him. Knowing how inconsiderate many people could be he's probably so used to that kind of response .
I would have had the urge to ask him what was wrong with his health but on the train everyone's staring at you anyway so I wouldn't want to make the guy feel worse. I would worry about whether it was contageous though but would have to trust that I'd be ok.
I would probably have more of a problem if my spirit didn't take to his energy.
How are you doing after the journey and what did you decide to do?
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wotsits18
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Posted: Tuesday October 26th, 2004 17:22 |
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@ BlackMatta : Afta dis  & den want'n 2 do dis l would've stayed but thought like dis  , b'ca l would've wanted 2 do dis very quickly ..
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Sooofresh
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Posted: Tuesday October 26th, 2004 17:34 |
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okay peeps
now what if the person STANK i mean blood curdling fish monger smell
would you move
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wotsits18
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Posted: Tuesday October 26th, 2004 17:49 |
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Sooofresh wrote: okay peeps
now what if the person STANK i mean blood curdling fish monger smell
would you move
Wat u mad, if da person was pen & ink, rah u would done feel Tom & Dick & dats b4 u even got near dem no matta wat carriage they was in..
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The Watcher
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Posted: Tuesday October 26th, 2004 17:56 |
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SF
If someone smells bad I got NO tolerance and NO sympathy!! aint NO excuse for it.
I would get up and move and impart and meaningful stern look at this foul person who so offended my nose. Depending on how strong the smell was I might also be inclined to kiss my teeth to further express my displeasure.
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Posted: Tuesday October 26th, 2004 18:13 |
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| Smelly people show a lack of respect for those around them. I would rather walk home than sit next to a fusty person, although I don't think I would go as far as my friend who carries air freshener around in her bag and is not afraid to spray in the direction of the offensive fusty person. And whats with dirty fingernails that just makes me heave
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Geoff
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Posted: Tuesday October 26th, 2004 19:25 |
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 I am embarrassed now....ever seen a white guy flush deepest red?
But my comment still stands....with some of the opinions I have read on here it is very comforting to know that the compassionate amongst us dont take into account the ethnicity of the sufferer....thats all.
Geoff
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Sage
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Posted: Tuesday October 26th, 2004 19:37 |
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Geoff wrote: But my comment still stands....with some of the opinions I have read on here it is very comforting to know that the compassionate amongst us dont take into account the ethnicity of the sufferer....thats all.
Geoff
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Sorry but you're still not being clear...
What does compassion have to do with ethnicity? Are you trying to say that blacks are incapable of having compassion for those who don't share the same skin color?....
Last edited on Tuesday October 26th, 2004 19:38 by Sage
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BlackMatta
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Posted: Tuesday October 26th, 2004 20:13 |
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Last edited on Saturday February 25th, 2006 16:37 by
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Geoff
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Posted: Wednesday October 27th, 2004 00:00 |
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Ashanti wrote: Geoff wrote: But my comment still stands....with some of the opinions I have read on here it is very comforting to know that the compassionate amongst us dont take into account the ethnicity of the sufferer....thats all.
Geoff
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Sorry but you're still not being clear...
What does compassion have to do with ethnicity? Are you trying to say that blacks are incapable of having compassion for those who don't share the same skin color?....
 .......Ashanti I am not trying to say anything so please dont put a slant on my words....my first reaction was that the person's ethnicity would have had some bearing on some of the answers....but as I reiterate....I am comforted to know that compassion ignores such things....full stop.......Nothing else...sorry if I inferred or led you to believe anything else.
Geoff
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Sage
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Posted: Wednesday October 27th, 2004 11:27 |
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@ BlackMatta....
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