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Kibibi
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Posted: Thursday September 29th, 2005 21:42 |
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I have a friend who is studying at the moment. She has a teacher who is constantly making out seem like she is incompetent and that she doesnt understand the work discussed in class or the work being set.
For example if people in the class do not understand what is being taught and she is one of them, she will make out like my friend doesnt understand it more...or she will make a big deal about it. She will kneel beside my friend and ask her if everything is alright-in front of the class.
It has gotten to a point where her comments during group work are being ignored because the rest of the people in the class are starting to feel she is incompetent because the teacher is making it appear so.
Before anyone says n e thing NO my friend isnt incompetent she can and does do the work...but the teacher will focus all attention on her for no good reason...and my friend is starting to lose her confidence in her chosen career.
Any (SOUND) advice on what to do is appreciated.
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Mezmerized
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Posted: Thursday September 29th, 2005 23:28 |
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| Blackbeauty, before i say anything, can i just ask is your friend at Uni or College? The reason is, there are different ways to go about this...depending whether she was at Uni or College.
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Kunjufu
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Posted: Thursday September 29th, 2005 23:38 |
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Blackbeauty: i'm sure other will come with specifics on this..but my first view after reading this would be that your friend sooner rather than later..needs to document in a diary..what was said, in what context and the day.. to work towards making a formal complaint..
I stress it is very important for your friend to diarise the occurances immediately, because without supporting witnesses this will be crucial if she is to have any chance of succeeding..
I would have suggested a quiet work with the lecturer..because he/she maybe unaware of their behaviour and its effect..but it sounds like its gone past this stage already...so I think she will have to pull him/her up sharpish.. The danger unfortunately is that they could start ti undermark her work..so Its a really tricky situation to be in..
Hopefully others might have additional advice on this, but these were my initial thoughts..
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Kibibi
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Posted: Thursday September 29th, 2005 23:39 |
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Mezmerized wrote: Blackbeauty, before i say anything, can i just ask is your friend at Uni or College? The reason is, there are different ways to go about this...depending whether she was at Uni or College.
Hi Mez.
She is a graduate and she is now at a 'school' that specialises in her career path...im not supposed to give out 2 many details. But it is after college and uni.
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Mezmerized
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Posted: Thursday September 29th, 2005 23:57 |
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BlackBeauty wrote: Mezmerized wrote: Blackbeauty, before i say anything, can i just ask is your friend at Uni or College? The reason is, there are different ways to go about this...depending whether she was at Uni or College.
Hi Mez.
She is a graduate and she is now at a 'school' that specialises in her career path...im not supposed to give out 2 many details. But it is after college and uni.
Blackbeauty, Been there myself....not after graduation ofcourse, but it was during Uni.....i did have to go and see an African counselor who gave me some sound advice on how to deal with it....i actually wrote it down and what am gone do is look for the note pad on which i wrote my instructions and then get back to you later on today......
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Kibibi
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Posted: Friday September 30th, 2005 00:00 |
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Mezmerized wrote:
Blackbeauty, Been there myself....not after graduation ofcourse, but it was during Uni.....i did have to go and see an African counselor who gave me some sound advice on how to deal with it....i actually wrote it down and what am gone do is look for the note pad on which i wrote my instructions and then get back to you later on today......
Thanks mez! Much appreciated 
and thanks K. All the advice given I will be passing along to her. K I told her to approach the teacher myself but she didnt want to do that...then I thought about it and I no longer think this is a good idea either. But the writing down of events is-I never thought about that.
This is really getting her down and she doesnt deserve this, she is a bloody good student!...i couldnt believe it when she told me the other ppl int he class were ignoring her comments during group work as if she didn tknow what she was talking about after the teacher started her nonsense-i was so angry!
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Mezmerized
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Posted: Friday September 30th, 2005 15:31 |
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Blackbeauty,i couldn't find the notes i made so am just gone give you what i can remember....
When i went to see the counselor, i was given two choices on how to deal with it.....so am gone give you both options, then you can discuss it with your friend on what is the best option for her.
The first option is that your friend can face her teacher by making notes of all the incidents, then make an appointment with the teacher in question. Go and see her, tell her exactly how she feels and that she is not there to make any baseless acusations.....she should make it clear that it should promptly stop or she would be taking it to the people higher up....it all depends on how your friend handles her teacher.....
The second option is that she could go to her Personal Tutor if she has any, or whoever is the head of her department. Again it would help if she document all the incidents and talk it over with the person in charge.
Whichever way she decides to go about it, it should be made clear that being picked on or made a fool of in front of others affects one's ability to contributes your views and achieve the maximum from the course. Its your friend's career that will suffer not the teacher's.....so she shouldn't feel apprehensive about telling the teacher exactly what she thinks of her behaviour.
Plus, they are both adults, its not school where bullies are feared for some mythical reasons.....there is absolutely NOTHING the teacher can do to your friend's career or grades......because if her teacher marks her unfairly, she can always request for her work to marked independently.
I hope your friend will deal with it as soon as possible. Its useless leting it drag on.....bullies don't just turn angels with time.....that teacher needs to be taken care of immediately, that way she will get it that your friend is very serious.
If it gets too much, your friend can request to be moved to another class...but i doubts that it would come to this....it would take too much time and energy for both of them.
Hope that helps
Last edited on Friday September 30th, 2005 15:34 by Mezmerized
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Saida.M
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Posted: Friday September 30th, 2005 17:31 |
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This is a very unfair situation.
Its one thing to tell a person to talk to the perpetrator but there are many who are intimadated, shy and/or inarticulate; as said before so many times, there should be a 'black' body who could speak on people's behalf in situations like this.
Is she part of the student union? If so maybe she could take her problem there. But as we are all well aware, white people are racists; she run the risk of these people also becoming part of the problem.
I've been in exactly the same postion once before, but all it took was a word to the teacher and he stopped immediately. It shouldn't even had to come to that, because no-one can't tell me they don't know what they are doing. It's ludicrous to suggest otherwise!
My advice is the same as everyone else's in that she should talk to the lecturer, write 'incidents' down, then if necessary take it to a higher official.
 N.B Mez - even sending your work back for an 'independent' to mark doesn't always work - they talk to each other you know - trust.
One thing to remember though, and I honestly believe this could be the main motivation for any possible change in the 'teacher's' behaviour, is that students mean money to them.
Every potential student has a price on their heads when they enrol at an education establishment - the establishment lose a student and they lose money. If teachers lose students, they lose their class, then they run the risk of losing thier income.
Something they usually can't afford to do.
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Kibibi
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Posted: Tuesday October 4th, 2005 18:10 |
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Hi guys.
Just read all the advice given and I want to say thanks for taking the time to respond.
I will definitely be passing your advice over and will keep you posted.
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Mafdet
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Posted: Tuesday October 4th, 2005 18:21 |
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@BB
I couldn't add anymore than what has been said already but would you let us know how your friend gets on with this problem.
Is there anyone in the class (student) that has actually noticed this as well ask your friend this question.
She must deal with this very intelligently because teachers can be revengeful and nasty at times.
Can't stress enough what everyone else has said and that is to note down everything.
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Posted: Sunday October 23rd, 2005 04:22 |
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SHe should first consult the teacher and tell her what she doesn't like about the way she talks to her.
If she continues, then your friend should manage and finish the class and never register with that teacher- if possible.
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Kibibi
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Posted: Sunday October 23rd, 2005 07:12 |
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She hasnt spoken to the teacher, but she is keeping a diary...so far she has more or less ignored the teacher...spoken to one other person close to her and feels stronger...so far, so good.
Once again thanks for all you advice...if there is a drastic change I will keep you posted.
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