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Deztinys_angel
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Posted: Wednesday August 10th, 2005 11:40 |
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I have a long term relationship, which is constantly full daily arguments over petty things, should I just walk away 
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Real Roxanne
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Posted: Wednesday August 10th, 2005 11:53 |
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| Yes if its really stressing u out.
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Deztinys_angel
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Posted: Wednesday August 10th, 2005 12:12 |
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It's stressin both of us out but i think it's affecting me more.
The thing is that i really love him and I know that he loves me but we argue over things that are sooooo stupid.
My dad died in December and i hadn't been to visit his grave since his funeral and you know when your really missing someone or something your day is just wrecked anyway I was supposed to go see my boyfriend (C.J.) but didn't make it cause i was back late. He phoned me around nine askin me if he should come to my house cause i've stood him up, i apologised and said i've just come back from my dad's grave and i'm at home. He got here now and started ranting and raving, i said i'm jus gonna give you air cause today's not my day and any little thing will make me flip, so that's what i did then he's tellin me that i'm bein childish because i don't wanna talk about what's wrong and sayin i've got problems so the argument went from about 9:45 till 11:00
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Real Roxanne
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Posted: Wednesday August 10th, 2005 12:21 |
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| He seems like the one with problems if he knew u went to your dads grave n still wanna argue that night, I think u 2 need some space.
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Deztinys_angel
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Posted: Wednesday August 10th, 2005 12:34 |
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That's what i was confused about too, cause his dad passed aswell and i know it affects him but he acts like it don't. The cause of the argument was becasue i didn't want to tlk about it and the funny thing is that there's times when he don't wanna talk but i don't throw fits and say he has problems.
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darkstargyal
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Posted: Saturday August 13th, 2005 22:15 |
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i agree, u shud jus walk away frm arguments, cos othawise u say stuff u dont mean etc
hope it works out alryt
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Mantings
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Posted: Sunday August 14th, 2005 10:01 |
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You say you have been in a long term relationship but the question is how long is long. It seems as though you are saying that it he who is at fault, have you shut him out? You say that his dad has recently died how did you support him? How long have you been arguing? when did it start?
It is pointless walking away from a relationship because you argue without knowing why you argue as you will just carry it to the next one like baggage.
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zyx098
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Posted: Thursday August 18th, 2005 15:12 |
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No do not just walk away.
Examine the relationship and see if you love each other. What is it that really triggers the argument? Lovers do not just argue. There could be an underling reason. What is the guarantee that if you walk away and get into a new relationship, the same thing will not happen? Have you examined yourself carefully? For all you know you could be the source of the arguments. Have a talk about this problem with your partner and see what both of you can do to stop this. There are other ways of resolving disagreements than arguments.
Walking away should be the last option. It should not be the first. Arguments occur in all types of relationship but the way they are handled make them sour or beneficial. Through arguments, sometimes, common grounds could be found. Arguments are not bad and do not be bitter about them. The problem is when each party insists on winning every argument. Both of you should understand that there would be arguments and they should occur out of love for each other if you, both, want to sustain the relationship. Anything that has occurred outside your relationship should not be allowed to harm your love for each other.
Last edited on Thursday August 18th, 2005 15:20 by zyx098
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DSP
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Posted: Friday August 19th, 2005 00:41 |
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I can't stand to argue everyday. It's stressful, life is too short for negative energy. There's a difference between ironing out issues, but constant bickering is nerve wracking.
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bluehoney
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Posted: Friday August 19th, 2005 02:28 |
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when we hurt...especially from a death of a parent...seems like our emotions get out of wack...and people who have living parents don't understand the pain that is there...seems as though if you 2 just talked about it with one another...things can get better...i understand because my mother died last year...and that is a hurt that makes you crazy sometimes...sometimes you need your space to cope..sometimes people want to help by asking what is wrong...but it is not that you don't want to tell them...its just that..it may hurt too much to tell them and remember why you are not telling in the first place.... sometimes we find idiotic reasons to throw people away cause it hurts too much to care...
i just say tell him...you need some time to grieve...cope...and heal...even if you have to write him a letter....if he loves you he should understand... and since he lost a parent also..he may need that time for himself to process what has happened, even if he does not realize it....
 sorry about your loss... i can't even lie and say things will get better...cause god knows i have my moments...but i can say they do get a tiny bit easier...
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