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tae
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| Joined: | Tuesday July 19th, 2005 |
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Posted: Tuesday July 19th, 2005 17:13 |
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Hi everyone,
I have been having a look around and decided my first post here, would be to ask for advice from you all.
Ok, firstly I am a 20 year old female living in London. I live alone with my father. I have a part time job and am currently looking for full time.
Now, the problem: my life is a mess. I spend alot of time alone because my dad spends the majority of his time with his girlfriend and other children. This depresses me because I have no family to come home to. I sometimes see my mother at weekends, but she suffers from mild mental health problems and I can't trust her.
Lately, I have started overeating for comfort. I am lucky to have a good figure but I am starting to eat until uncomfortably full, and this isn't good. I have considered throwing up after doing this but haven't yet.
I have no social life at present. I have a best friend but I don't like the clubs/places she goes to. I grew apart from my friends at school. I am a perfectionistc, and don't feel I can go out to a club or wherever unless I look what I consider "perfect".
It takes me a while to trust people. Often, when I see men looking at me, i shut them out because I fear letting a man get to me emotionally. I have never had a boyfriend although I want one. When I see men looking at me, at the back of my mind is: "I'm not good enough for him". How do I overcome this?
I am finding it hard to get a job, and what I really want is a job in black music. I have tried record shops, radio stations etc but had no luck.
I am not depressed and I'm not ugly or weird, I'm just having some problems trying to get my life into gear. At the moment I'm not living, I'm existing. And I don't want to turn 21, and my life be the same. I don't want to get old and have regrets.
I need some advice on any of these subjects. If you think you can help, I would appreciate your opinons.
Thanks for spending time to read this.
Tae
Last edited on Tuesday July 19th, 2005 17:31 by tae
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Posted: Tuesday July 19th, 2005 17:15 |
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WOW!!! what a post
anyway hi how you doing?
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tae
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Posted: Tuesday July 19th, 2005 17:32 |
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| I edited my post.
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Posted: Tuesday July 19th, 2005 17:36 |
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ok Im not gonna try to adress all your points but you do know that all the overeating aint gonna help matters.
what kinda stuff are you consuming when you do this?
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tae
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Posted: Tuesday July 19th, 2005 17:55 |
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Black_power wrote: ok Im not gonna try to adress all your points but you do know that all the overeating aint gonna help matters.
what kinda stuff are you consuming when you do this?
Y'know, comfort food or junk food. Bread, pizza, chips and ice-cream. I don't even taste it, I do it to kind of block out stuff I think. I only recently started doing this, but I don't want to continue overeating.
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huzzah1
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| Joined: | Monday September 13th, 2004 |
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Posted: Tuesday July 19th, 2005 20:33 |
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tae wrote:
Lately, I have started overeating for comfort. I am lucky to have a good figure but I am starting to eat until uncomfortably full, and this isn't good. I have considered throwing up after doing this but haven't yet.
I have no social life at present. I have a best friend but I don't like the clubs/places she goes to. I grew apart from my friends at school. I am a perfectionistc, and don't feel I can go out to a club or wherever unless I look what I consider "perfect".
It takes me a while to trust people. Often, when I see men looking at me, i shut them out because I fear letting a man get to me emotionally. I have never had a boyfriend although I want one. When I see men looking at me, at the back of my mind is: "I'm not good enough for him". How do I overcome this?
I am finding it hard to get a job, and what I really want is a job in black music. I have tried record shops, radio stations etc but had no luck.
With some of your issues you may want to address these on the Womens Forum.
Are you or have you studied at college or uni? It's now July and Colleges / Uni's will be advertising their 2005 / 2006 courses. Have you thought about studying Media or Music? It's a step in the right direction and it will enable you to focus on yourself rather than worrying about other people.
Getting into the music business is hard, it's mostly about who you know. You got to be prepared to take a lot of knocks if you want to carve out some kind of career. On the other hand if you can write you may consider writing articles or reviews for newspapers or the internet - it's where a lot of people start out.
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Sooofresh
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Posted: Tuesday July 19th, 2005 20:39 |
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hiya
first
before embarking on career choices...............you need to look at your family situation
your mum is ill and not her fault , yet it is not fair on you not have emotional stability.....................your dad is like many nowdays that believe as long as they provide food then they did *their job*...............although I am sure your dad is not intentional doing that................do talk to him and tell him that you want him to give you some attention................to feel part of family...........if that does not work look for other members of family..............build comfort with peopple that care..........instead of food.
everything else will fall back into place.
hope that helped
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FineBoy
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Posted: Tuesday July 19th, 2005 20:57 |
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I will help you with your emotional needs first, then if things goes well, I will give you advice and if things are rosy, I will help you financially .
First thing first, you want a Boyfriend, suscribe to Loverboy.com, you don't need any qualifications- you don't have to pay anything , all you need is your Picture.
We would get back to you within 24 hours if successful, if however, you do not hear from us within 24 hours, do know that you have not been sucessful on this occassion, this shouldn't make you sad because you can re-apply with another picture.
Remember, We will not charge you for your application.
You have nothing to lose.
We are here to help you
Motto: always reaching out to help
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Allaccess
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| Joined: | Thursday June 23rd, 2005 |
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Posted: Wednesday July 20th, 2005 10:08 |
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| I would prefer if there were better slightly more helpful ones than by fineboy...but thats a personal opinion. I would suggest that you talked to your Dad, I am sure that he would be alarmed that you feel this way. Tell him you need to talk and explain your problems to him as much as possible, if you cant then write him a letter and try and establish some type of better relationship with him. although he has other children I am sure he cares for you otherwise he wouldnt have you living with him If he doesnt believe how you feel...send him to the forum to check it out himself.
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